Indlela yokufunda ukuyeka abantu?

Ngelishwa, ebomini asifanele sihlangane kuphela, kodwa ukuba sihlukane nabantu. Yaye la maxesha, ngamanye amaxesha, abe sisifo esibi kakhulu entliziyweni nasemphefumlweni. Unokufunda njani ukuvumela abantu ukuba bahambe ukuze ungabandezeleka ngenxa yamanxeba angamavakalelo kwiminyaka emininzi?


Ukwazisa

Ngamanye amaxesha kwenzeka ukuba siziva - sifuna ukukhulula umntu, kuba kuya kuba ngcono thina kunye naye. Kule meko, kubalulekile ukuhlalutya imeko ukuze uqaphele: ngaphandle kwayo, ubomi bakho buya kuguqulwa. Kungakhathaliseki ukuba kunzima kangakanani entliziyweni, kungakhathaliseki ukuba lukhulu kangakanani uthuthuko, zama ukucinga ngokulinganayo. Ngokungathandabuzekiyo, kunokuba nzima kakhulu, kodwa kwezinye iimeko kusemfuneko ukuba ucime iimvakalelo. Ngoko ke, ukuba wenze isigqibo sokuba ulahlekelwe ngumntu onobudlelwane bakhe obulethe inkathazo, zidumise ngokulinganisa kwaye ungavumeli ukuba uzinikele kwiimvakalelo. Ngamnye wethu kufuneka akhethe loo bomi kunye nabo bantu basenza sibe nolonwabo ngokomoya. Ngoko ke, ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba awukhathazi ebantwini, kufuneka uhlale uhamba. Kwaye akukhona nje nge-tehsituation xa ukhubekile. Kwenzeka ukuba ulwalamano lubonakala luqhelekile, lube luhle, kodwa uyaqonda ukuba lo mntu uphumelele, kuba unemibono eyahlukileyo, izimo zengqondo ezahlukeneyo kwiimeko kunye njalo njalo. Kule meko, akufanele udidlwengule, uchaze indlela oziphatha ngayo kukuba uziva uxolo kumntu, sele ube ngabahlobo kunye nangoko. Ngamanye amaxesha kufuneka sivumele ukuhamba kwabahlobo abadala, kuba sikhula, sitshintsha, sinobuchule kunye nabanye abantu, asivumelani nje. Kwaye ekugqibeleni ulwalamano lwakho alupheli ngokuzondana, kufuneka nje udibanise kwaye uvumele ukuhamba.

Yithi hayi ukunyaniseka

Uninzi lwethu alukwazi ukuvumela umntu ukuba ahambe, kuba behlala becinga ngako, khumbula izimo ezahlukeneyo, ukuphulaphula iingoma ezibangelwa imibutho edibene nayo, jonga amabhayisikobho aneendaba ezifanayo. Ngoxinzelelo kunye nesimo sengqondo, wena, ngokwemvelo, awuyi kukulibala ixesha elide malunga nobani ofuna ukumyeka. Kwezinye iimeko, amadoda kule nto kulula, kuba abanalo umkhwa wokuthetha ngokuphindaphindiweyo ngeento ezifanayo, ukukhumbula yonke into encinane njalonjalo. Kodwa amantombazana ahlala efuna ukukhumbula, xubusha nabahlobo umntu oshiye ubomi babo, njengokungathi kubangelisekile. Ukuba uyazi ukuba ungumfazi onjalo, zama ukuzivimbela ngokwenene ukuba ungene kwi-nostalgia. Ngokukhawuleza xa uvakalelwa kukuba ufuna ukuthetha ngento ethile, phulaphula ingoma okanye ubukele i-movie - ngentando yakho, tshintsha enye into. Ekuqaleni kuya kuba nzima kuwe, kodwa ekugqibeleni uya kulusebenzisa kwaye ufunde indlela yokulawula iimvakalelo zakho. Ukuwela kwi-nostalgia, thina ngokwethu sifuna ukuhlupheka, kuba sikholwa ukuba xa sikhala zonke iinyembezi ukuba zome, kuya kuba lula. Oku kunenyaniso ethile: ukuze usinde into ethile, kufuneka uqale ukukhala. Kodwa ukudabuka kwakho akufanele kube yinto yokudandatheka okuqhubekayo, nto leyo ebangela ukuba kubekho ukukhanya. Ngoko soloko uzama ukuhlala namhlanje kwaye ungacingi ngento eyenye. Kwixesha elidlulileyo, unamaxesha amaninzi kwaye kufuneka bahlale kwimemori yakho, kodwa ukuba uhlala ngokusisigxina kuphela, ekugqibeleni ubomi bakho buya kuma. Njalo khumbula oku kwaye uzame ukucinga ngazo zonke iindleko kuphela ngekamva.

Musa ukuzingca

Kwenzeka ukuba asikwazi ukuyeka umntu, ngenxa yokuba sigula kwaye sibi ngaphandle kwakhe. Kwaye sithetha malunga nendlela yokukhulula umntu kwelinye idolophu okanye ilizwe, kwaye malunga nokumnika umntu inkululeko enkulu yesenzo kwaye angaboshelwa yedwa. Inyaniso kukuba nantoni na enobungakanani esingazange siyenze, umntu ngamnye ungobugovu. Ngokulula, abanye banokubamba nokulawula ukuzingca kwabo, u-adhl umntu onjengale ndlela yokuziphatha uyinto eqhelekileyo. Ukuba awukwazi ukukhulula umntu ngenxa yesi sizathu, khumbula oko kuthetha ukuthini "uthando lokwenene". Ukuba simthanda umntu ngokunyanisekileyo nangenene, sihlala simkhwela kakuhle, sihlala sifuna ubomi apho uya kuba yinto eyonwabileyo. Kwaye nangona obu bomi buqala ukugeleza kwesinye isixeko, kunye nelizwe, ukuba ngenxa yobu bomi udinga abantu ngaphandle kwakho, kufuneka uxolelane nale nto kwaye unqwenela umntu onoyolo. Uyamthanda, uyamthanda kakhulu kangangokuthi awukwazi ukumvumela ukuba ahambe. Ngoko, ukhokelwa yintando yakho, kufuneka uqaphele ukuba lo mntu uza kuba nethamsanqa ngokwaneleyo ukumnika ithuba lokufumana oko akufunayo. Ewe, akukho mntu uthi uya kuba lula kwaye kulula. Kodwa zama ukucinga indlela ehleka ngayo ngokuvuya, indlela amehlo akhe aya kukhanya ngayo. Cinga ngalento yonke ixesha uhanjelwe yintlungu kunye nomnqweno wokubopha umntu. Xa ucinga ngakumbi ngonwabo, kuya kuba lula kuwe ukuba uzibophezele ukuba ungekho kusondele kakhulu ngaphambili. I-Tembolee, ukuba lo mntu ungokoqobo kuwe. Nje uya kuxabisa ukudibanisa ngakumbi.

Iingcebiso zezoshishino

Ngokuqhelekileyo asikwazi ukuyeka umntu, ngenxa yokuba sisetyenzisiwe kwizinto ezithile, ukuzonwabisa kunye nokunye okunjalo. Enyanisweni, asinamathele kumntu ngokubhekiselele kwimiba elinganiselweyo, apho kungekho nto imangalisa nayo yonke into ibonakala ifakwe ngaphambili. Ngokwemvelo, xa umntu enjalo ephela, sinokufumana ixesha elininzi lokukhululeka, esimele sithathe kwaye sesaba. Yingakho siqala ukuphosakela izibonda uze uzame ukuzibuyisela. Kwaye, ngokwenene, endaweni yokuba ufunde ukusukela kwithuba elidlulileyo, kufuneka ufunde ukujonga imisebenzi emitsha, izinto ezithandwayo kunye nokunye. Esikhundleni sokubandezeleka ngaphandle komntu, vele utshintshe ubomi bakho, qalisa ukwenza izinto ongenakukwenza ngazo. Ndiqinisekile ukuba unomnqweno, owawungekho ixesha elaneleyo. Emva koko kwabonakala kuwe ukuba unokwenza ngaphandle kwalokhu, kodwa ukuba uhlalutya le meko kwakhona, ngoku ukuba unesithuba samahhala, qiniseka ukuba uya kuqonda ukuba zingaphi izinto ezingenziwanga kwaye zingaphi iziqhamo ezingazalwanga. Ngoko unakekele, endaweni yokujonga eludongeni kwaye uzihlalutye ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba ubomi bakho obucwangcisiweyo buyeke ukuhambelana neshedyuli, eyake yaveliswa kwaye yaba yinto eyaziwayo. Qinisekisa, kuya kuthatha ixesha kwaye uya kuqonda ukuba ulungelelaniso olutsha kuni alukho mnandi kunomdala. Awudingi ukuba ube weteksi kwindlela ethile yobomi. Ngexesha elihle kukuhle ukutshintsha yonke into. Yaye khumbula oku, kwaye indoda endiyithandayo kwaye uyayithanda, ikunike ithuba lokufunda into entsha.