Ngokubanzi, ukuba udibanisa yonke le mibuzo, mhlawumbi ebaluleke kakhulu, kuya kuzwakala ngathi: "Indlela yokunxibelelana nomthandayo?".
Okokuqala, kufuneka kuqondwe ukuba akukho bantu ababini abanemibono yehlabathi kunye neembono zehlabathi. Ngenxa yoko, wonke umntu unombono wakhe wesiganeko esifanayo. Emva koko, njengoko kuyaziwa, bangaphi abantu, ezininzi iingcamango. Ngako oko, musa ukucaphukisa kwiqabane lakho, ukuba akayiqondi into ethile, ingakumbi ukuba kubonakala kuwe. Kwaye ngakwelinye icala, ukuba kukho into ekhubekisayo, kufuneka ukhulume ngokukhawuleza malunga nalo mntu uyintanda.
Musa ukuqala ingxabano ekuqaleni. Kungokwemvelo ukuba akukho buhlobo ngaphandle kokuxabana. Kodwa ungayisebenzisa kwakhona ngenzuzo. Kubalulekile ukukhupha iimpawu ezimbi ezivela kumbambano, ukuchonga izinto ezintle kwaye ngaloo ndlela ziqinisa ubudlelwane. Emva kwakho konke, indlela olawula ngayo ukulawula ingxabano ibaluleke ngakumbi kunokuba umxholo weengxabano ngokwawo.
Kukho iindlela ezininzi zokulungisa iingxabano. Ezi zibandakanya ukukhuselwa, ukukhutshwa kunye nokufumanisa. Ukukhuselwa kukufumana ithuba lokuzikhusela ekuhlaselweni okanye ekuthintela ukukhusela. Oko kukuthi, kufuneka uhlale uxolo, ungaphenduli ulwaphulo-mthetho, kodwa ungaphinde unqothule, ngenxa yokuba le ntshukumo iya kubangela ukuqiniswa kwemeko engqubuzanayo kunye nomthandayo. Ukungabikho kwempikiswano kufuneka kusetyenziswe kwiimeko apho uxinzelelo oluvela kumlingane luqine kakhulu kwaye ungayigcinanga, okanye awukwazi ukuzilawula. Ngoko ke, kulungele kule meko ukushiya, ngelixa iqabane lingagcini. Kwaye, ekugqibeleni, ukuvula. Ukuvulwa kukuvumela ukuba ukwandise uxhulumaniso kwaye ufunde okungakumbi ngokumthanda wakho kuphela, kodwa nakwawe. Le yona khetho. Emva koko, xa zonke iindonga ezikhuselayo ziwa phantsi kwaye ingxabano iba yinto yentsebenziswano, yilelo hlobo lolwalamano lokwenene kunye noqhagamshelwano olunyanisekileyo luqala.
Kwakhona kuyimfuneko ukuba ukwazi ukuphulaphula umthandayo. Kucacile ukuba iimfuno zinokuhluka. Emva koko, umntu uthanda ibhola, kwaye umntu uthandwa kwifashoni. Kodwa ukuze ungakhubekisi iqabane, ndiphinda, kuyimfuneko ukumphulaphula.
Kubalulekile ukuba ufunde ukungaziphazamisi. Nangona uvumelana nomntu othandekayo, phulaphula uze ufikelele ekugqibeleni uze ubonise uluvo lwakho. Emva koko, njengoko kubonisa, abantu bambalwa bafuna ukuqhubeka ibali emva kokuphazamiseka.
Ukunyamekela kufuneka kuthatyathwe kunye nobubele kwiingxaki namava omlingane. Xa kuyimfuneko, kunika, njengoko besithi, "uthele umphefumlo wakho," uncedo malunga neengcebiso okanye ujonge nje. Oko kukuthi, nakunoma ikuphi na, bonisa ukuba awukho ngaphantsi kwakhe kwaye ukulungele ukumnceda.
Ngokwahlukileyo, kufuneka kuthiwe ngomona. Emva koko, nabani na obenomona onomthandayo. Kwaye kule mizuzu, ungathetha ukuthetha kakubi, oko uya kuzisola. Ngoko ke, ukuzola ku funeka kuthethwe ngamabango abo kunye nezicelo, kunye kunye ukuxoxa ngezisombululo nezisombululo. Emva koko uza kuba ngumcebisi wobudlelwane bomhlaba, apho umgaqo obaluleke kakhulu ulungelelaniso. Emva koko, ukuba awuyiqondi indlela yokuphakamisa ilizwi lakho, bonisa ubundlobongela, kwaye uqhagamshelane ngokuzinzileyo kwaye uqonde izenzo zothandekayo wakho, ngoko uya kwenza into efanayo, ephefumlelwe ngokuziphatha kwakho.
Ngoku qha ga mshelana konke oku kunye kunye nokongeza iziqu ezizimeleyo kulwalamano lwakho, kwaye uya kufumana isicwangciso esipheleleyo sokuthetha nomthandayo. Inhlanhla!