Ngoko, indlela yokwenza aba bantu bakuhloniphe - masicinge ngalo mbandela kunye. Ngenxa yoko kuyimfuneko ukuqonda ukuba yintoni eyenza ukungahloneli, nto eyenzekayo kwaye kutheni ungabonwa njengalinganayo. Wonke umntu ubona ibhinqa okanye into yokuqwalasela, okanye umhlobo, okanye ukudibanisa kokubili. Ukuze umntu othandayo ahloniphe, kulungile ukubhekisela kwindlela yokugqibela. Kule meko, indoda encinci ibona kuwe kungekuphela nje ukukhangwa, kodwa nayo ingqondo, i-erudition nezinye ezininzi iimpawu azixabisa kubafana. Yintoni endiyenzayo ukuze ndimenze aqaphele ukuba awuyena nje intambo, kodwa umfazi onokuthetha nayo yonke into.
Enyanisweni, akunzima ukukwenza umntu azixabise nje kuphela njengesigubungelo esihle. Into eyona nto kukuba uyazi ukuba ungokoqobo kuye. Abaninzi abafazi benza impazamo yokukholelwa ukuba umfana uya kumncedisa kuphela ngamehlo amahle. Ewe, kuya kuthi, kodwa kungekudala. Ukuze wenze ubudlelwane bexesha elide, kuyimfuneko ukusebenzisa amandla, ukuhlala unomdla ngaphandle nje kuphela, kodwa nangaphakathi.
Ngoko, yiyiphi inyathelo kunye nezigqibo ezifunekayo ukuba zithathwe ukuze othandekayo akuhloniphe, kwaye akayi kumkholisa njengodonsa omuhle?
Kule nto, kuyimfuneko ukuyifanisa ngokwengqondo. Yonke insizwa iya kuvuya, eyazi ukuba umfazi wakhe uyamthandwa kungekhona nje ngokuba unomfanekiso omhle, kodwa unengqondo engavamile. Ngoko ke, ukuba ubona ukuba awukwazi kwaye ungaqondi into ethile, zama ukuyiqonda. Musa ukwenza konke ngokwakho, kuba ezinye izinto zinzima ukuziqonda ngokwazo. Ndikholelwe, kuya kuba mnandi kumntu oqhelekileyo ukukuchazela oko ungayaziyo, kodwa kuye kuyisikhwama. Okokuqala, kuya kuba elinye ithuba lokuba uzive njengomntu onamandla kwaye okhaliphile, kwaye, okwesibini, uya kukuhlonela ngokuba uyakwazi ukuqonda ukuba awukwazi konke, kodwa ngexesha elifanayo uzama ukuqonda nokuqonda indawo ezintsha ngawe phambi kokungaziwa.
Amadoda amaninzi ahlonipha abafazi abaqonda oko kuthiwa "ngamadoda" omsebenzi. Kungaba nantoni na: uomatshini, inkqubo, ukunyuka kweentaba. Ukuba uyinyaniso ye-Ass kwinto enjalo-inhlonipho iqinisekiswe kuwe. Kufuneka nje ukubonisa ulwazi lwakho ngexesha, kodwa ungaxineli amadoda ngengqondo. Owesifazane oqilileyo kunye nowesifazane, ngokubonakala konke kubonisa ukuba isondo sesilisa sincinane kunalo-ezi zinto zihluke ngokupheleleyo. Ungalokothi ulibale le nto kwaye ungaguquli intonga.
Kakade ke, abafazi bayayihlonela nje kuphela i-intelligence. Kukho iindlela ezininzi zokufumana inhlonipho yabantu. Umzekelo, abantu abatsha bathanda abafazi abanamandla nabanobulumko. Ngoko ke, umntu akaze afune ukulungelelanisa i-hysteria kunye nabafana. Oku kubangela ukuba bacaphuke kuphela kwaye kukhokelela ekudakaleni. Naluphi na imeko, soloko uzama ukucinga ngokucokisekileyo. Kuhle ukuxabana, unike iingcebiso, kodwa ungagxininisi umbono wakho kunoma ubani. Ukuthanda abafana kunye nokuhlonela abasetyhini abangenzi mhlophe, musa ukuzivelela, kodwa zama ukukwenza konke kwizinto ezintle zekhono zabo, ngaphandle kokuguqula ama-muslinkazikazi.
Ukongezelela, ukuba indoda ibaluleke kakhulu ukuba ibhinqa liyayithanda kwaye ihloniphe. Nangona uyazi ukuba awuyena mzekelo ophezulu, akufanele uxoxe ngawo kubantu abancinci, khalaza ngokubonakala kwakho kwaye uthi ungadingi mntu. Le ndlela yokuhlonipha ayifumanekanga ngokupheleleyo. Okokuqala, kufuneka ukwazi malunga neemfanelo zakho kwaye uhlale ugxininisa. Amadoda ayidla ngokukhawuleza ukuhlonipha izinto ezingabonakali ngengqondo. Ngokuqinisekileyo, banomdla kubo, kodwa kunokuba into yokulala ngokwesondo, kunokuba ube ngumlingane wobomi. Kodwa bayabahlonela kakhulu intombazana enokukwazi ukugxininisa isidima sabo kwaye bafihle iimpazamo zabo, ngelixa behlala belula ukuthetha kunye nokuzithemba.
Ewe, kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba amadoda ahlala enesimo sengqondo sokuxhasa abantu besifazane abangaboni ngokuziphatha, bezama ukugxininisa ukuchaneka kwabo, ukuhlukana okugqithisileyo kunye nokuziphendulela. Abaninzi babo bafuna ukubona umfazi ebhinqileyo, ubuncinci ngezikhathi ezithile, ngubani ongayiqonda iminqweno yabo, akayi kuyika ubunzima kwaye akayi kubakhumbuza ukuba intombazana, kwaye ngoko ke wonke umntu makamncedise.
Amadoda ayahlonela abafazi ngenxa yokuba banako. Hlalani nikhumbule ukuba ukuncoma, ukuthunyelwa ebuhle bakho, akusiso sizathu sokuba sicinge ukuba uyahlonishwa. Abafana banokubonga ukubonakala, kodwa ngexesha elifanayo bathetha malunga nendlela ophantsi ngayo ukuphuhliswa kwengqondo, kwaye unento enokuyenza, ngaphandle kokuvavanya ukubonakala nokulala ngesondo.
Isizathu sokukholelwa ukuba uyahlonishwa, sinokuba ngamazwi alungileyo amantombazana malunga namandla omlingiswa wakho, ukuqonda, ukuqonda. Amadoda ayawahlonela abo banokufumana ulwimi olufanayo kunye nabo kwaye baqonde iingxaki zabo. Ngokukodwa ezi mpawu zinceda kwimeko xa ufuna ukwenza abahlobo bakho nabahlobo bakho. Ukuba le ntombazana ingesabi "iindoda", iyakwazi ukuxhasa incoko kwaye iqonde iimfuno zabafana - ihlonishwa.
Ewe, umthandayo uya kukuhlonipha xa ufunda ukuzola kunye nokulinganisela, unokunika iingcebiso eziyimfuneko, kodwa awuyi kucinga ngokucacileyo ukuba uluvo lwakho luphela kuphela, unokuyiqonda ngokufanelekileyo kwaye uthathe umdla kumsebenzi walo wokuzonwabisa, kungekhona nje yenza sengathi ufuna ukwazi okuthile malunga nayo. Emva koko uya kubona kuwe ukuba umfazi onokumthembayo, onokuyithanda, kwaye ke, inhlonipho.