Umkhwa wokufumana
Enyanisweni, i-psychology yabantu abadala ayifani kakhulu nomntwana. Xa sihlala sinika umntu yonke into, ekugqibeleni uyayifumana kwaye, kwizinga elikhulu okanye elingaphansi, liqala ukuthatha yonke into evulekile. Ngendlela, oku akuthethi ukuba umntu ulungile. Ngamnye wethu uyayiqonda le mpawu ngendlela echanileyo kwaye ehloniphekileyo. Ngaphantsi kwento engumntu oyinyaniso, ibhalwe phantsi, ukuba umntu uhlala enza konke ngaye. Ekuqaleni unako ukukhanyela, uthi akukho nto ifunekayo. Kodwa ukuba ubona ukuba thina ngokwethu siziphatha njengolu hlobo lonwabo, ngokokuqala uyayeka ukumelana naye, kwaye uya kukhangela. Emva kwexesha, uyayeka ukuxabisa into esiyenzayo kuye ekuqaleni. Ngokuthethileyo, ukuba ubona oko, umzekelo, umzalwana wakho uhlala engenakho imali kwaye uyamnceda, ngoko okokuqala unokuthetha, ngoko uya kubulela, kodwa ekugqibeleni uya kuqala ukuyithatha njengomsebenzi, engasayi kucinga ngako, kodwa akayi kuyenza. oku kukulahleka kwakho. Kwaye, oku akusoloko kuthetha ukuba umntu uya kukuyeka ukukuqonda okanye ukuqala ukuzingela, nangona kukho na matyala anjalo. Hayi, uya kuhlala ethanda uthando, kodwa uyayeka ukucinga malunga nokufuneka uhlawule lowo mnikeli. Kwaye akuyi kugwetywa ngenxa yalo, kuba wena ngokwakho uye wonakalisa umntu. Umbonise ukuba unokuhlala uncedisa, kukuphi oku kukuvuyisa kwaye awuyi kuhlupheka ngenxa yento oyenzayo. Ukuba, emva kokuphelelwa kwexesha, uqala ukumxelela ukuba akacingi ngawe, ukuhlambalaza, njalo njalo, umntu ophangiweyo akayi kuwuqwalasela. Usetyenziselwa ukuba uncedo lwakho alukho ubunzima, ngoko ke, ngoku uqala ukwenza into, ufuna nje ukubethelela kwindawo engekho. Ngaphezu koko, yena akazange abuze nantoni na, ngoko ke unelungelo luni lokufaka amabango?
Abantwana abaninzi baphatha abazali babo ngendlela efanayo, nangona bakhula. Banokuthanda uMama noTata kakhulu, kodwa xa befika ezihlokweni ezinjalo, bayothuka kwaye bacaphuke, kuba bayaqiniseka ukuba abazali banokubanceda, kuba ngaphambi kokuba benze njalo. Umkhwa wokuba unzulu uqokelele kumntu osengqondweni kwaye sele akakwazi ukucinga ngemeko eyahlukileyo. Ukuqhawula umntu, wamguqula waba ngumntwana, kwaye wena ngokwakho ungumzali ohlala ubomi bakhe bonke ngomntwana wakhe aze amnike yonke into. Nangona umntu omdala kunye nozimeleyo unokulula kwaye ngokukhawuleza ujwayele ukuphazamiseka okunjalo. Ngaphandle kokuba uqaphele, uyakubona umama onothando olungele nantoni na apho iingxelo ezinomsindo onokukuhlawulisa ngayo into enzima. Ngendlela, ukuba uphahla umntu ontle ngokwenene, uya kuhlala esabela kwisicelo sakho kwaye akuncede, nangona kuya kubonakala kungeyonto engaqhelekanga, ngenxa yokuba ungumntu omdala, kwaye ungumntwana nje onokumkela, anganikeli.
Le meko ingaba nzima ngakumbi xa uphawule umntu ozigwenxa oye wazama ukuhlala "entanyeni yomntu". Kule meko, umntu ophangiweyo akayi kuthatha kuphela uncedo kuwe, kodwa uya kuqala ukunyusa, ukuba akafumani nto oyifunayo. Yile ndlela abaziphatha ngayo abafana, abaya kuthandana nabasetyhini abadumileyo. Abafazi abanjalo, bengayazi, bathenge uthando nothando. Naliphi na umfazi othanda nokungaqinisekiyo ukuvakalelwa ngento enokumenza umntu abe nesidenge sentliziyo ukuze abonise indlela amthanda ngayo, kunye nokuzama ukuzibopha. Kule meko, umntu olungileyo ongaziva ngumfazi, vele uchaze yonke into kwaye uhambe, kodwa i-egoist kunye ne-gigolo iya kuhlala kwiindawo zokuziphatha njengomntwana oncinci. Oko kukubuza nje akuyi kuba yipipi okanye ithoyizi. Ekugqibeleni, kuvela ukuba amabhinqa athengisa abantu abahlala kwiindawo zokuhlala kunye neemoto, kwaye abo baphendule, bayakhubekisa, bafowunele kwaye bathumele ngaphezulu nangaphezulu. Ngenxa yoko ukuthandwa kwabathandekayo kakhulu isithembu. Ngamanye amaxesha uqala ukufikelela kwintlondi, kunye namantombazana amnandi, ukuze azikhusele, zama ukwenza okungakumbi ukuphumelela uthando. Ukulangazelela ukuthandwa ngabantu abathandekayo bahlala kwenzeka phakathi kwabo baninzi abaninzi. Abakholelwa ukuba banokuthandwa njengaleyo. Apha baqala ukumbamba umntu kwaye ekugqibeleni, esikhundleni sothando, bafumana ukudelelwa nokuhleka.
Ukungeniswa
Ukuthungatha umntu, phakathi kwezinye izinto, siphuhlisa nokusilela kokuzimela. Okokuthi, xa umntu ebona ukuba nangaliphi na ixesha siza kuhlangula aze amncede, uyayeka ukuzama ukufumana ngaphezulu ngamandla akhe. Emva koko, kutheni uziqine kakhulu ukuba kukho "intambo kunye nomdlalo" onjalo uhlala uhlangula. Kungenxa yoko oku kuba abantu abadala banqatshelwe ngokubanzi. Endaweni yokunceda, utshabalalisa ubuntu, udale umhlaba ocebileyo wobuvila. Ngokomzekelo, ukuba umntu unomvuzo ophantsi, oqala ukufumana iimfuno, uqala ukucinga malunga nento enokuyenza ukuze ufumane imali eyaneleyo yokuzonwabisa, kunye nezinye iimfuno. Ngako oko, uyazivuselela ukuya esikolweni, utshintshe imisebenzi kunye njalo. Kodwa ukuba uyazi ukuba ujikeleze, ngoko imfuneko yokutshintsha into yanyamalala. Ngaloo nto, ngaphandle kokuba akunakwenzeka ukwenza ngaphandle, yena ngokwakhe uya kuzuza kunye nayo yonke into oyithengayo. I-Vitoga inokwenzeka ukwenzela ukuba uzinqabile kuzo zonke izinto, usebenzele othandekayo, kwaye uya kuphila ngokuzonwabisa kwakhe, ingakumbi ngaphandle koxinzelelo. Qaphela, yile ndlela ababizwa ngayo ngokuthi "ootata" oonyana kunye neentombi baziphatha ngokwabo. Bahlala beyazi ukuba uTata uya kuzithenga imoto kunye neendlu, ngoko bafunda ngandlela-thile, basebenza ngendlela efanayo kwaye abaziphendukeli kuzo zonke izidakamizwa ezinomsindo. Kwaye konke ngenxa yokuba ngexesha elifanelekileyo uyise nomama banikela konke kwaye abazange bavelise ukuzimela. Yingakho ngoku banqwenela ukuqhubeka bephila ngeendleko zabazali babo, kuba abanakho ukukhupha okanye umnqweno wokufezekisa into ngokwabo.
Ngoko ukuba uthembele ngokunyanisekileyo nomntu, yibani umntwana, mzalwana, mhlobo, ndoda, ungaze uvumeleke kakhulu umntu onomthi. Yonke into oyenzela yona inokuyenza ingozi enkulu.Zama ukuzilawula ukuze ukwazi ukuzimelela ngokwenene, ufunde ukuqonda into oyenzela yona, kwaye ube nefuthe lokuziphucula. Umntu ngamnye kubaluleke kakhulu kukuba uncedo lwenkxaso kwizihlobo zakhe, kodwa ukuba uhamba kakhulu kunye nalo, unokumonakalisa umntu kunye nomlingiswa wakhe, kwaye uguqulele umthandayo kumntwana omncinane owaziyo "ukunika."