Yiyiphi impindiselo?
Ivakalelo lokuziphindezela ngokuqhelekileyo lifaniswa nesifo, kuba sisona sinomonakalo sinokukwazi ukuthatha ingqondo yomntu kangangokuthi ijika umntu ukuba abe khoboka ocinga nje ngendlela yokwenza isicwangciso sakhe sokuziphindezela.
Impindezelo yenza umntu abe nemvakalelo engathandekiyo kwaye engathandekiyo enokuyicinga nje. Umntu wempindiselo uyazikhethela abantu abahlukeneyo kwaye bonke aba bantu badibanisa i-ego ebuhlungu kunye neyobukhulu, kunye nokungakwazi ukunyamezela abanye ukungaphumeleli kunye nokungakwazi ukuxolela umntu. Kukho, ewe, ukungafani, kwaye nokuba umntu othe tye kwaye onothando uxolo unokuziswa.
Kodwa impindezelo ayiyikulimaza kuphela. Kwimbali kukho iimeko apho, ngenxa yokuziphindezela, ziye zaba ngabantu abadumileyo nabaphumelelayo.
Izizathu zokuvela kwindlela yokuziphindezela inokuba yinani elikhulu kakhulu. Ukungcatsha, ukuhleka usulu, ukugwenxa, ukucaphuka nokunye okuninzi. Kodwa kukho abanye abantu abaqala ukuphindisela kumntu kungekho sizathu esicacileyo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, ukuphindiselela kulandela abantu abanelisekile nabangenelisekanga, ekubeni ngokuphumeza isicwangciso sabo sokuphindezela, bazama ukubonisa lonke ihlabathi ukubaluleka kwabo.
Kwakhona, inzondo ingaba yimbangela yoko kwenzeka kwaye ke kunzima kakhulu ukujamelana nale mvakalelo, kuba into enokuba nomona ingatshintsha, kwaye uya kuhlala kwinqanaba elinye.
Isizathu esona siqhelo ngumona. Impindezelo eyenza umntu ohlala ekhwele ukwenza izinto ezahlukeneyo ezinokulimaza inani elikhulu labantu abangenacala.
Ngaba kufanelekile ukuphindezela abantu abaphulaphuli?
Kuphela umntu ngamnye unokuzigqiba isigqibo sokuba aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde aphinde awenze. Kwaye ukuze uzame ukuziphendulela kulo mbuzo, cinga ukuba ngaba isikhalazo sinene kakhulu kangangokuthi uchithe amandla amakhulu kunye namandla kulo mntu? Kodwa ke kufuneka uqonde ukuba ngaba uya kufumana ukwaneliseka ngokuziphindezela okanye ngokuphambene nolu hlobo, ngaba uya kubandezeleka ngakumbi kule nto? Ngaba unokwenza ukuba ummangaleli aphinde aphinde afune ukuguquka?
Ukuba awuzikhohlisi konke ukulinganisela, ngoko kwiimeko ezininzi uya kuba nempendulo "akufanelekanga".
Ukuze kulungiswe nayiphi na ingxaki kubaxhaphazi, kukho iindlela ezininzi, eziphambili kakhulu kunokuba ziphindezele. Ngamanye amaxesha ukungahoywa komntu okanye ingxoxo elula kunye naye kunokulungisa imeko kwaye kukulondoloze kwiminqweno yokuziphindezela.
Ukuba sele sele uzimisele ukuphindisela, ngoko kufuneka ucinge ngendlela yokwenza ngayo? Yilumke uze ungabuyiseli kumoni ngaphezu kokukwenzileyo kuwe. Ukwenza isicwangciso sokuphindezela, musa ukulibala malunga nomthetho, kuba abantu abaninzi bavele banqamle intonga kwaye ngaloo ndlela bafumana iingxaki ezintsha. Kwaye njengoko bethetha ngomthetho kungcono ukuba ngabahlobo!
Kwaye kubaluleke kakhulu, zama ukucinga ngakumbi ngaphambi kokucwangcisela ukuphindisela, kuba unokuzilimaza ngezenzo zakho.