Umama noninazala bahlangana nawe esibhedlele kunye neentonga zeentyantyambo, bachukumiswa ngumntwana wakho kwaye ... wasalaka emehlweni. Kanye ngeveki okanye ezimbini babiza, banomdla kwindlela izinto zihlala ngayo kwisizukulwana esincinane. Bangakwazi ukuza kutyelela "ukuhamba umntwana" (kungekho rhoqo kwaye emva kokunyanzelisa ixesha elide). Yaye lo ngumda. Awuyilahla ngaphaya kwesibhedlele somntwana, kunye neenganekwane kunye namahlaya ekhitshini ngenzame yokunyusa umntwana, okanye ukulala kunye neengoma xa amazinyo atyunjwa. Ngaba oogogo abayithandi umntwana? Yaye ukuba uthanda, ngoko kutheni ungahambi ukutyelela kaninzi?
Kufuneka uqale ngento yokuba ngokungafani nendima yomama, enokucetyiswa kwangaphambili xa ulungele le ngqondo, ngokwezinto eziphathekayo nangokwenyama, indima kagogo, ngezinye izihlandlo, ayiyi kucetywanga ngokupheleleyo kwaye iwela kumfazi njengekhephu entloko yakhe, xa oku akunakulindela. Ibhinqa liba ugogo lingenalo inkululeko yakhe yokuzikhethela kunye nentando yakhe. Ukufunyanwa kwimeko enjalo, abafazi bavame ukulahleka kwaye baziphathe ngendlela eyahlukileyo kunokwesiko, kodwa ngaba bafanele bagwetyelwe ngenxa yale nto? Makhe sizame ukuqwalasela iimpawu ezahlukeneyo zokuziphatha okungagqibekanga kootatomkhulu kwaye uzame ukuqonda indlela yokuziphatha kubomama abatsha?Inketho eyodwa: Unina omkhulu
Umsebenzi usoloko uhleli kwaye uhlala kulona suku intsingiselo yobomi bomama okanye uninazala. Unogogo, ohlala exakekile emsebenzini okanye eninzi izinto azithandayo, izinto ezithandwayo kunye nezinto ezithandwayo, kuya kunceda kakhulu abazali abangandululwanga ngaphandle kwenzondelelo kunye nesifiso esifanelekileyo. Unako ukunika iingcebiso ezimbalwa zokunyamekela nokukhulisa umntwana kwifowuni okanye ukuthumela isikhwama ngezinto ezintsha okanye amathoyizi omntwana, kodwa akunakwenzeka ukuba ube ngumhambi osisigxina endlwini yakho kwaye uya kukukhawuleza okokuqala kwifowuni. Ngaba unesivakalelo sokuthi uyazikhupha ekunxibelelaneni nosana kwaye wenza okungakumbi ngomsebenzi wokusebenza kwaye kuba "kuyimfuneko", ngokwenene, kuba ufuna nje ukuhlambalaza aze adibanise kwaye axhumane nomzukulu wakhe? Musa ukukhawuleza ukuya kwizigqibo ezifikelela kude. Inokwenzeka ukuba, uloyiko lokuba umntwana wakho unokutshintsha yakhe esele isungulwe kwaye isungulwe ubomi kwaye ivelise utshintsho olukhulu kunye nobunzima. Ngoko ke, uzama ukuhlala kunye neminye imicimbi eqhelekileyo, kwaye umzukulu wakhe okanye umzukulu wakhe ulandela umgaqo-siseko wokulahla olwahlukileyo kwiimeko zakhe eziphuthumayo.
Yintoni endiyenzayo? Kuyafaneleka ukudibanisa nale nto kwaye ungabonakali kwi-granny of evil. Kungcono ukwenza oko ukuze ahlale enomntwana, nokuba akukho nanye, kodwa kunye nawe. Zama ukumtyelela ngokuphindaphindiweyo uze umzukulu wakho (ebenxibelelanise lesi siganeko kwangaphambili, ngokuqinisekileyo). Makhe abone ukuba umntwana uzisa uvuyo, kwaye yonke into ayitshintshi impilo yakhe. Emva kwexesha, umzukulu uya kuba yingxenye yobomi bakhe, kwaye unxibelelwano luya kubakholisa bobabini nje uvuyo.
Inketho ebini: Unina omncinci
Ngokuqhelekileyo kwenzeka ukuba ukuzalwa komntwana kufumana ugogo ozayo engazi. Akwazi ukuba aziphathe njani, yintoni enokuyenza, unokuqala ukungathandabuzeki, kwaye ukuba ulungele ukuba ngumakhulu kunabo bonke, kodwa kubaluleke kakhulu - ngokukhawuleza uqala ukuvakalelwa ngakumbi nangendlela eqinileyo yokuguga kwaye engasemncinci. Musa ukumangaliswa ukuba ngokukhawuleza ufumanise ukuba uyazifihla kubahlobo bakhe, abahlobo okanye abasebenzisana nabo ukuba umzukulwana wakhe wazalelwa waza waba ngumakhulu omtsha. Kalula, ufuna ukuhlala eselula njengangaphambili, kwaye angayikuzibiza ngokuthi "ugogo", ngokuzenzekelayo aphendule umfazi oselula kumntu omdala. Musa ukusikrokra kuwo, akusaziwa ukuba uziphathe njani xa usendaweni yayo. Mnike ixesha lokuba asebenzise le nxaxheba entsha, kufuneka aqonde kwaye aqonde le nyaniso. Emva koko, abantwana bakhe baye bahlala bekhulile, abazukulu baqalisa ukuzalwa, oko kuthetha ukuba yena ngokwakhe ukhule kakhulu, kwaye oku kufuna, njengoko bethetha, "ukugaya", uqaphele kwaye uqaphele.
Yintoni endiyenzayo? Indlela efanelekileyo yokuzisa ugogo nomzukulu wakho kukushiya umntwana wakho kunye naye ubuncinane ngamanye amaxesha. Mhlawumbi xa behlala kunye kunye kwaye akukho namnye onokubenza baphazamise, uyamkhathaza umntwana, uya kukhumbuza ukuba ngezinye ixesha wayenomthwalo omncinci ezandleni zakhe kwaye wacinga ukuba emva kokuzalwa kwabazukulwana bakhe kunye nokufumana imeko entsha kagogo, Ubomi abupheli, kwaye ngeendlela ezininzi kwaneziganeko ezintsha kunye neziganeko ezivuyisayo ziqala.
Inketho yesithathu: Unina ongenalwazi
Unyoko okanye unyoko wakho ungeke ukwazi ukuba uphatha njani umntwana wakho osana. Akunjalo ngokwenene, kunjalo. Mhlawumbi ngamanye amaxesha, xa wayengumama osemncinci, ubeka yonke into yokunyamekela umntwana wakhe kumagxa asegogo, kwaye ngoku ke ukwesaba ukuthatha umntwana eengalo zakhe, njengeyokuqala. Kodwa le yimeko elula kwaye elula ukuphathwa.
Yintoni endiyenzayo? Ukuba ngaba kungenalo ulwazi oluthile lokugogo olutsha olutsha, zama ukumnceda ukuba anqobe ukwesaba kwakhe. Thatha inyathelo, mbize ukuba aphuze itiye kwaye ashiye umntwana (kodwa ngethuba elifutshane!) Nogogo wakhe kuphela. Unako, umzekelo, cela umyeni wakho okanye intombi yakho ukuba bakubiza ngexesha lokutyelela kwakhe, kwaye ushiye imizuzu engama-20 ukuya kwimizuzu engama-20 kwimeko ephuthumayo (ekuthiwa ngumhlobo owathengileyo kubantwana bakho abantwana okanye ithoyiyi - kufuneka uyikhethe okanye uyibone esitolo ngokuqinisekileyo eso siqhamo okanye ubisi lwefom, apho umntwanantwana wakho akucebisa, - kuyimfuneko ngokukhawuleza ukugijima ukuthenga). Xa ufika ekhaya, unokufumana uMakhulu-ncinane ... ukhathazekile. Kodwa oku kuphela okokuqala. Emva kokutyelela kathathu okanye ezine (kwaye ixesha lingancinwa ngokukhawuleza ukuya kwiyure nesiqingatha), ungalinda iziphumo ezilungileyo zokuqala. Kungekudala kungenzeka ukuba ugogo uya kuqala ukukunika uncedo lwakhe.
Ukulwa nobunzima bokungenisa oogogo ukuba baxoxe nabazukulwana, yonke into iya kuzuza kulo. Uya kuba nexesha elininzi lokukhulula, ongayisebenzisa kuwe. Usana luya kuba nolunye umhlobo kunye nomthandayo onokumthemba. Unogogo ekunxibelelaneni nabazukulwana bakhe baya kufumana umbane wamandla kwaye phambi kwamehlo abo baya kulahla iminyaka embalwa.