Ngoko, ukuphendula umbuzo: Ukuba umntu uhamba, nokuba ufanele ukulwa naye, kufuneka uqonde isizathu sokuhamba kwakhe kwaye uqonde ukuba kutheni wanquma ukwenza oku kuwe. Ngaba kwenzeka ukuba yintombazana eyabangela ukuhlukana? Kakade kunjalo. Ladies ayingcwele. Bayazi indlela yokwenza iimpazamo, ukuguquka nokucaphukisa amadoda abo ukuze bangabi nobuhlobo obunye, uthando kunye nento enjalo.
Ukuba unjalo kwimeko kwaye, ngoku, uyazisola ngokuqinisekileyo, ngoko kuyimfuneko, okokuqala, ukuvuma iimpazamo zakho. Ngokuqhelekileyo, kunzima ukuxelela nokuba ungekho ngokupheleleyo. Ukuba umntu unokukwazi ukuvuma kuye, ngoko uya kuba yinyanisekileyo kunye nabathandekayo bakhe xa ehamba ecela ukuxolelwa. Ewe, akukho bani uya kukunika ikhulu leepesenti isiqinisekiso sokuthi intanda yakho iya kubuya. Mhlawumbi ukuhlamba kunamandla kakhulu. Kodwa ukuba uyaluxabisa umntu kwaye uyabaluxabisa, kufuneka ukulwele iimvakalelo zakho. Okokuqala, kufuneka ucele ukuxolelwa, uguquke ngokwenene phambi kwendoda. Musa ukunxusa kwaye ugxininise ukuba umele axolele aze abuye. Kwiimeko ezinjalo, awukwazi ukunqumla. Kufuneka uqonde kwaye uqonde oku. Ngaphandle koko, inzame yokuxolelana iya kuba yinye ingxabano kunye nokuxhaswa. Ewe, ngendlela, malunga nokuchongwa kwemvakalelo. Musa ukubamba iqela kumntu, njengokungathi uphendule ubomi, gwada ngamadolo uze ungavumeli ukuhamba endlwini. Oku kuyabuhlungu nokunyanyekayo. Akayi kuluxabisa loo nto. Eyona nto ibhetele, khula, ulinganise kwaye uthembeke. Kuphela ke uya kufumana ithuba lokudibanisa. Mhlawumbi kuya kwenzeka ukuba uxolelane akukhawulezi. Kuthatha ixesha lokuba le nsizwa iphile kwisiphene sayo kwaye ikunike ithuba lesibini. Musa ukuthoba kwaye ulandele umfana kwizithende zakhe. Ngamanye amaxesha, ngamanye amaxesha uyamkhumbuza ukuba uyamthanda kwaye uyamxabisa lo mntu kwaye ulindele ukulindela nayiphi na inombolo yithuba lakho lesibini. Zama ukukholisa loo mfana wezenzo zakhe ukuba utshintshe kwaye awuyi kuphinda uphinde uphendule iimpazamo zakho. Abafana abakholelwa ngokwenene ngamazwi, ngenxa yokuba abayithandayo kwaye abayi kuchithachitha amagama. Kungenxa yoko akufanele ubhalele kuye imihla ngemihla, ubize uze utshele malunga nendlela olungileyo ngayo ngoku, ukuba uyamthanda njani kwaye ulungele nantoni na. Yiba nje into afuna ukukubona. Ihlabathi lijikeleze, ngoko ke, ulwazi luya kufumana intanda yakho kwaye, mhlawumbi, iya kutshintsha umbono wakho ngawe. Kwimeko enjalo, ukutshintsha ubomi bakho kunye nomdla, mhlawumbi, yindlela ephela yokulwa nomthandayo. Kwesinye imeko, mhlawumbi le ndlela ayiyiyona nto ibalulekileyo kwaye ingakhokelela ekubeni umntu osemtsha uza kusebenzisa. Kodwa ukuba ekuphumeni ungumgwebi, kufuneka usombulule imeko yakho.
Ewe, le meko inokuhluka. Kule meko, umfana akayi kushiya ngenxa yeepazamo zakho. Kalula, uthi akayithandi, kodwa, mhlawumbi, akazange amthande. Indlela yokwenza kwimeko enjalo, yintoni enokuyenza kunye nendlela yokuhlala nayo? Ewe, xa uthanda umntu, kunzima ukuphulaphula umbono womnye umntu. Kubonakala kuwe ukuba akukho mntu uyayiqonda into kwaye akanakuqonda ukuba ubuhlungu nokuba bubi kangakanani. Enyanisweni, abantu abaye badlulela kwizinto ezinjalo baqonda yonke into ngokugqibeleleyo.
Mhlawumbi, yingakho bacebisa ukuba bayalibale malunga nalo mfana. Cinga ngokwakho, indlela onokulwa ngayo nomntu ongekho kuwe kwaye, ngokubaluleke kakhulu, akafuni ukuba ngumnini. Emva koko, unokulwa kwaye ulwe kuphela apho kukho iimvakalelo. Yaye ukuba ayenakho, kuba kutheni bafanele balwe imfazwe? Ukuba umntu osemncinci uhlala kunye nawe, okungenakwenzeka, uya kuba sisigxina nje. Imiphefumlo yethu ayikwazi ukunyanzelisa umntu okanye into ethile. Bahlala bekhululekile nangona umzimba, ngenxa yezizathu ezithile, unxulumene nento engenandaba nentliziyo. Ngoko cinga ngenyameko, ngaba ufuna ukuba neerobhothi ecaleni kwakho engayivakalelwa kuwe oko uvakalelwa ngako. Qonda ukuba ubudlelwane obakhelwe ngenceba abuzange bulethe nabani na igrama yentonwabo. Indoda ehlala nawe kuba ibuhlungu ukujonga ukuhlushwa kwakho kungekudala okanye kamva ikuthiyile, njengoko iya kulahla inkululeko yakhe yokukhetha kunye nethuba lokuvuyela. Bathi ukuba uyayithanda, kufuneka uvumele ukuhamba, ngenxa yokuba unomdla wokwenene xa unqwenela umntu onoyolo nabani na, kungekhona nje wena.
Kungoko, kungcono ukuba ungalwi uthando olusele luvele luye. Ewe, akukho mntu uthetha malunga noko kuya kuba lula kuwe. Ekuqaleni, ubomi buya kubonakala bunzima kwaye bunzima. Kodwa kufuneka ube namandla kwaye uphile kule xesha. Khumbula ukuba xa uthando lukhutshiwe, konke okufanayo, kungekudala okanye kamva kudlulayo. Kalula, kuyimfuneko ukusinda kweli xesha kwaye ungazivumeli ukuba ungene kwixinzelelo. Qonda ukuba kule meko, akufanele umlwele, kodwa wena. Kungenxa yokuba ubomi bakho buya kutshintsha kuxhomekeke kukuphi uhlobo lokuziphatha ozikhethayo. Yaye ungavumeli ulahlekelwe yintliziyo kwaye uzifake kwiindonga ezine.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuba uziva buhlungu kangakanani, qhagamshelana nabahlobo bakho, zama ukuzithokozisa uze uzame ukuhlala. Kancinci, intlungu iqala ukutshabalaza ayiyi kuba yinto enzima kwaye ingenakuxoliseka njengoko yayisisiseko. Uza kuqala uhlawule abanye abantu. Qonda loo mbuzo: ukuba umntu uyashiya - nokuba ufanele ukulwa naye, kwimeko enjalo impendulo eyodwa kuphela. Kuzwakala ngathi "Cha" ecacileyo. Khumbula njalo oku kwaye ungalokothi uvumele ukuhlaziswa phambi komfana, kungakhathaliseki ukuba ungamthandi kangakanani. Ukuba uhlaziswa kwaye ulungiswe kumntu, akaze akwazi ukukuthanda kwakhona. Ngokuphambene noko, loo mfana uya kumisa ngokubhekiselele kuwe aze aqale ukusebenzisa. Ngoko ke, ungalwi nento ehamba ngonaphakade. Kungcono ukukuvumela ukuba uhambe kwaye uqalise ubomi obutsha apho kuya kuba nolunye ulonwabo nolunye uthando.