Ekuphuhliseni kwabo, abafana bahamba kwiinqanaba ezintathu eziphambili.
Isigaba sokuqala siquka ixesha ukusuka ekuzalweni ukuya kwiminyaka engama-6: ubudala apho le nkwenkwe inxibelelwano lwengqondo kunye nonina. Le nkwenkwe "yakhe," nangona indima kayise ebomini yomntwana nayo inkulu. Injongo yemfundo kweli xesha kukudlulisela kwinkwenkwe uthando olukhulu kunye nesimo sokukhuselwa ngokupheleleyo.
Isigaba sesibini sisusela kwiminyaka eyi-6 ukuya kwe-14. Ngeli xesha le nkwenkwana ifunda ukuba yindoda, ibheka uyise, iminqweno yakhe nezenzo zakhe. Iinjongo zemfundo ngeli xesha: ukuphakamisa izinga lolwazi, ukuphuhliswa kwamakhono okudala. Musa ukulibala malunga nobubele nokunyaniseka-oko kukuthi, zama ukuhlalisa ubuntu obumanyeneyo.
Kwixesha lesithathu - ukususela kwi-14 ukuya kwixesha elininzi-le nkwenkwe idinga umzekelo wothisha wesilisa. Abazali baya kwimvelaphi, kodwa kufuneka banikele ngunyana womcebisi ofanelekileyo, ukuze indawo yakhe ingabandakanywa ngumlingane ongenakuqonda. Injongo yemfundo kweli nqanaba kukufundisa uxanduva kunye nokuzithemba, ngokubandakanyeka ngokubandakanyekayo umntwana osemdala. Imigaqo ephambili yokukhetha utitshala kufuneka ibe yokhuseleko kunye nokunyaniseka.
Ezi zigaba aziguquki ngokuzenzekelayo okanye utshintsho olushushu phantsi kwefuthe lomnye wabazali. Eyona nto ingcono xa abazali bebamba iqhaza elisebenzayo kwimfundo nokuqeqeshwa kwonyana ukusuka ekuzalweni ukuya kubadala. Amanqanaba abonisa kuphela utshintsho lokugxininiswa. Makhe siqwalasele ngalinye iqanaba.
Iminyaka emnene (ukususela ekuzaleni ukuya kwiminyaka eyi-6)
Iintsana zifana neyona nto ephambili: nokuba intombazana okanye inkwenkwe (akubalulekanga kumntwana okanye kubazali bakhe), bonke bayayithanda xa behlala bekhutshwa, badlala nabo, bathanda ukugcina ihlabathi elibajikelezile. Ngethuba lexesha lobomi, kubalulekile ukuba umntwana abe nokuxhamla kunye nomntu omnye. Ngokuqhelekileyo ngumama.
Ukwahlukana phakathi kwamakhwenkwe namantombazana kubonakaliswa ukuzalwa. Amakhwenkwe ayaqonda ukuba uthintela kumlinganiselo omncinane kunamantombazana. Amakhwenyana akhula ngokukhawuleza, adlala ngokuphangaleleyo, aqonde ngokucacileyo ukwahlukana nomama. Egadi, abafana basoloko bengayinaki iindwendwe, kunye namantombazana, ngokuchaseneyo, baqaphele kwaye wenze abahlobo.
Ngelishwa, abantu abadala bahlala bephatha abafana kakhulu. Uphononongo lubonisa ukuba amantombazana athunjwa ngokuphindaphindiweyo, nangakumbi kwiminyaka engengomlomo. Amakhwenkwe ahlala esoloko aze ahlwaywe kabuhlungu. Izifundo zibonisa ukuba abafana abanamalungelo okuhlukana, kuba abafana kufuneka bahlale ekhaya baze babe neminyaka emithathu. I-Crèche ayifaneleki. Abafana bavame ukubonisa iimpawu zokuxinzezeleka kwengqondo ngenxa yokushiya ukungabi nantoni, ngenxa yoko, ukugwenxa kunye nokukhathazeka okungenabungozi okuba yintsholongwane. Imodeli efanayo iyaqhubeka kwezinye iintsapho nasezikolweni.
Ukuqatshelwa kwesibindi (ukususela ngo-6 ukuya ku-13)
Ekubeni kwiminyaka engama-6 kunye namakhwenkwe, utshintsho olubalulekileyo luqala ukuvela. Phakathi kwabo, isibindi siqala ukuvusa. Abafana ababukela iTV ngexesha elide, ngokukhawuleza banomdla kwizixhobo, baphupha iingubo eziphezulu, balwa kwaye balwa, badlala imidlalo enomsindo. Kukho into ebaluleke ngakumbi, uphawu lwazo zonke iinkcubeko: malunga neeneminyaka ezithandathu, abafana baqala ukukhangela amalungu omntu osapho - oyise, utata, umzalwana omdala. Bahlala befuna ukuba kufuphi nomntu, bafunde kuye into ethile, bakhuphe izenzo zakhe, baxelise yonke into.
Ukuba ngethuba lexesha ubaba uya kuhoywa umntwana wale nkwenkwana, unokuvelisa nezenzo ezingafanelekanga, ukuba nje ukhangele. Kulo thuba ukutsalwa komntwana, i-enuresis, okanye ukuziphatha okunyanyekayo esikolweni kungaqala (ngamanye amaxesha onke kanye). Nangona kunjalo, olu tshintsho luthando aluthetha ukuba umama uyahamba. Unina akafanele ahambe kude nendodana yakhe, njengoko oku kungenza loo nkwenkwe iqinisekise ukuba iimvakalelo ezinxulumene nomama - uthando kunye nobubele - zizisa iintlungu. Uya kufaka ikhethini kwaye kuya kuba nzima kuye ukubonakalisa ukufudumala novelwano kumntu. Ukuvalelwa ngokomzwelo emva koko kunzima ukuwina.
Ukusuka kwinkwenkwe ukuya kumntu (ukusuka kwi-14 ukuya kumdala)
Malunga ne-14 ubudala, isigaba esitsha sokukhula komzimba siqala. Ngeli xesha, abafana banwebekile ngokukhula, ezininzi iinguqu zenzeke emzimbeni: ukwanda kwinqanaba le testosterone lidlula 800%! Nangona yonke into yodwa, kukho into eqhelekileyo kule minyaka: amantombazana anenkani kakhulu, aphumule, kukho utshintsho oluthe rhoqo. Yile ndlela ukuzalwa komntu omtsha kwenzeka ngayo, kwaye ukuzalwa kuqhubeka nomzabalazo.
Amahomoni asetsheni kunye nomnqweno owenziwe kwihlabathi elidala, kwaye singazi kakuhle (kwaye kaninzi siqaphela) sifuna ukumgcina ebuntwaneni bakhe iminyaka embalwa, ukulibala malunga nokukhuliswa okufanelekileyo. Akumangalisi ukuba ngeli xesha kuvela iingxaki. Kule minyaka, kubalulekile ukuphakamisa umoya wentsha, ukuyiqondisa ekudaleni, ukunika ithuba lokuvula amaphiko. Zonke iingxaki - utywala, iziyobisi, ulwaphulo-mthetho zivela kwinto yokuba abantwana abafumani indlela yokuphuma kwintswelo yokwenza ubuqhawe kunye nozuko. Nayiphina impucuko eyenziwa kumakhwenkwe amakhwenkwe kunye nokugxininiswa kwazo ngokukhethekileyo. Kwiinkcubeko zasendulo, ulwazi lugcinwe ukuba abazali abakwazi ukufundisa abafana abaneminyaka engama-10 ubudala ngaphandle kooncedo lwabangaphandle. Ngokwesiko, abantwana abaselula babegcinwa ngabantu abadala ababafundisa isayensi yempi kunye nezobugcisa.
Umntwana osemncinci weshumi elinesine okanye elishumi elinesibhozo akanakulungele ukuma wedwa nehlabathi labantu abadala. Ufuna ootitshala. Abafundi abaselula abasoloko bephulaphula abazali babo. Omnye umba. Intombazana iyamxabisa, ifuna ukuba njengaye. Umsebenzi oyintloko ootitshala ukugcina umntwana ukuba aphumelele kwiimpazamo ezibulalayo. Abazali kufuneka banakekele ukukhetha utitshala ofanelekileyo. Ba nokuba ngabahlobo bakho. Kumele aqhube incoko kunye nonyana wakho, xubushe ngeziganeko. Ngokufanelekileyo, umntwana osemva uba ngumhenyi owamkelekileyo kwikhaya lakhe, ngoko u titshala unako, ukuba kunyanzelekile, "kucacise ubungqina bakhe", kwaye uya kukwazi ukukhala kwisikhwama sakhe.
Imithetho emihlanu yoMntwana oKhulisa iMfundo yoMntwana
1. Qalisa imfundo ngokukhawuleza. Ukuthatha inxaxheba ekunyamekeleni umntwana ekuzalweni - iyalela kwaye iguqulwe phambili. Oku kuya kukunceda ukuba uguqulwe kumatshini omnye kunye nonyana wakho.
Thola ixesha lokuthetha intliziyo ngentliziyo. Ukuba uyise uhlala elala emsebenzini, kuya kubachaphazela kakubi abantwana.
3. Musa ukuyeka imizwa. Abantwana banako kwaye kufuneka baxhunyiwe. Hlanganisa imidlalo enomsindo ngokuqhagamshelana noxolo.
4. Jabulela kwimpumelelo yabantwana bakho. Ukuba uchitha ixesha kunye nabo ngenxa yecala okanye umsebenzi, akuyi kubakho nzuzo. Fumana izinto ozithandayo.
5. Musa ukulibala malunga nokuziphatha. Ukuseka imimiselo yomntwana wale nkwenkwe kufuneka ihlale ngokuqinileyo kwaye ihlaziye, ngaphandle kwesijeziso somzimba. Qiniseka ukuphulaphula umntwana kwaye ucinge ngeminqweno yakhe.