Njengoko kuthethwa ngokuchanekileyo ngabavumisi beenkwenkwezi nabasetyhini, amadoda namabhinqa baya kuthandana kwaye babonise iimvakalelo zabo ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo, kuba abafazi basuka kuVenus, kunye namadoda avela eMars. Ngenxa yokuba kunzima kuthi, isiqingatha salo lonke, ukuqonda omnye nomnye, kuba kunzima ukuzimisela - uyayithanda?
Akunabo bonke abantu lo mbuzo uba nguyena nto ebalulekileyo ebomini, kodwa kubafazi - kuwo wonke umntu ubuncinane kanye, ebomini kwithuba elincinane, kodwa ukukhanya ngendoda kufuneka iguquke kuyo. Ihlabathi kuzo zonke iintlobo zayo ziyahlukana ukuya kwimvelaphi, ishiya yokuqala kuphela umbuzo obuhlungu: uyayazi njani ukuba umntu uyakuthanda? Kuye kwaziwa ixesha elide ukuba ibhinqa liyakwazi ukuthintela kwiimvakalelo. Uninzi lweentombi ze-Eva zihlala nemvakalelo, engazi ukubala into ethile kwaye ucinge phambili. Yaye ke ngoko kumfazi kungenakucingela ukuba ngubani okhethiweyo wakhe, phi, kangakanani na owamkelayo kwaye osebenzayo. Akakwazi ukwazi nantoni na ngaye, kodwa phantse uhlala ephendula ngokulula ngombuzo onjalo olula, ukusuka kumbono wakhe, nokuba uyayithanda yena nguye.
Kuphi kunzima ukuphendula lo mbuzo kumntu! Ngokuqhelekileyo, nokuba ummeli wesigxina esiqinileyo akanakuqonda ukuba uyayithanda umntu okhethiweyo. Abanye bakholelwa ukuba oku akuyona nto ephambili, abanye - ukuba yonke into icacile ngaphandle kwemibandela, okwesithathu bayesaba ukuvuma, kwaye okwesine ayifumanga impendulo kuyo. Akukho nto okanye ayibi, kubalulekile. Ubudala, ukukhuliswa, imbono, isikhundla kwindawo - konke oku kunempembelelo enkulu kumlinganisi kunye nomoya womntu. Njengaye kwabesetyhini okanye akunjalo, kodwa bahlelwe njengale - ngenxa yabo, iimvakalelo azikho ekuqaleni okanye kwindawo yesithathu.
Ngoko njani? Indlela yokufumana inyaniso, ukuze ungabandezeleka kwizinto ezingaziwa, ungenzi izicwangciso ezingenakwenziwa? Indlela yokujonga, okanye konke oku kubonakala ngathi, ukubonakala okubuthathaka kobudlelwane bokwenene?
Ukunika isiluleko esicacileyo kunye nesebenzayo apha akunakwenzeka ukuba baqaphele: akusikho nto abayithethayo ukuba ufuna ukulahlekelwa yintloko yakho, ukulungisa ubudlelwane phakathi komfazi kunye nendoda. Nangona kunjalo, yiloo nto akufanele uyenze, ngoko "ihlola". Akukho mdlalo "odlalwayo" owenziwe ngokufanelekileyo, izimo ezibekwe phantsi, iintlekele eziphazamisayo okanye iingxaki eziqulunqiweyo aziyi kukhokelela kuyo nayiphi na into enhle. Kwaye akukho nakwizakhono zobumbele zowesifazane kunye nabancedisi bakhe, kwaye kungekhona kwindawo "eyakhelwe kakuhle". Kulula nje konke, kwanokudlala ngempumelelo, ayiyi kubonisa imeko yangempela yezinto, kuba umntu omdala, ngokusekelwe kumava, unokuthi "isethi" ethile kwindlela okanye imeko leyo, kubandakanywa engekho emgangathweni. Kwaye ukuba umntu ukhaliphile, ukuba ngokukhawuleza uyaqonda ukuba uhlolwe, ubuhlobo buya kutshabalaliswa kanye kunye. Akuyena wonke umntu onikwe ububele, kodwa akukho mntu ulahlwa yikratshi nokuzithemba.
Ukuqonda ukuba umntu uyayithanda ngokwenene, ubomi boqobo kuphela buya kunceda. Enyanisweni, awudingi nantoni na. Ibhinqa yileyo kunye nomfazi ukuba azive kwaye azibone. Okokuqala, phendula ngokunyanisekileyo umbuzo-ingabe uyakuhlonipha? Ingaba wazisa abazali bakhe, njengoko ebonisa isangqa sahlobo bakhe, oogxa nabo? Ukuba ewe, oku kulungile - kuthetha, kwaye inhlonipho iboniswe, kwaye ithemba, kwaye iceba ubuhlobo besikhathi eside. Ukuba akunjalo, ke kukho into yokucinga ngayo ...
Ukuba umntu akaxolisi ukuthetha ngabaphambi bakho kunye nobudlelwane nabo, ngoko ke, ngokucacileyo, akayikukuxabisa kwaye akayikuzikhusela iimvakalelo zakho. Ukuba akayathethi ngexesha elidlulileyo kwaye mhlawumbi ushiya imibuzo ecacileyo, oku kufuneka kukuqaphele.
Ungakulibali ukuba amehlo ayibubuko bomphefumlo, jonga ngenyameko, kufuneka ibonise impendulo kumbuzo oyintloko. I-intuition eyaziwa kakhulu yowesifazane nayo inomdla kakhulu. Into ephambili kukuba ufunde ukumthemba, kwaye ungathethi kubahlobo, intombi kunye nabamelwane, ukumnceda ngokubona kunye nengqiqo, kwaye unokuqonda yonke into.
Ngokomzekelo, ukuba umntu ukhukhumezeke ngobusuku obubusuku, ukukuncoma ngemincoma, kodwa "akayi kubona" nini ukunika uncedo, kwaye xa uthetha nje, uhlale ukhulule, - akunakukuthanda. Kwaye ukuba ngamaxesha ngamaxesha naye uchaza "ubunzima bezezimali" kwaye ucela into yokuhlawula, ke apha, njengoko bethethayo, kunye neendawo zekhofi ayimfuneko: wahlala ngokuzinzileyo. Kwaye nangona ukhethiweyo wakho unobumnene kwaye unesineke, unenkathalo kwaye unomusa, kodwa ngezinye izikhathi, oku akukona uphawu lothando lwakhe.
Kodwa ukuba uzama ukukunceda nangona ungakulungile, ukukhawuleza nokuphazamisa xa uxutsha, ungayikhohlwa into encinci okanye into exabisekileyo kuwe, ukuba akayikugculela ukwesaba kwakho kwaye wabelana nobunzima obomi, anikezi izipho kuphela, kodwa ingqalelo, ixesha, ukufudumala komphefumlo - ngoko, ngokucacileyo, unenhlanhla. Emva koko, umbuzo ukuba uyayithanda, awuyi kuvela entloko yakho.