Ukunyuka kokuziphatha okungalunganga kuyaqhubeka kwiinyanga eziliqela emva kokuqhawula umtshato. Ngokuqhelekileyo kungekho ngaphantsi kweenyanga ezimbini, kodwa kungekho ngaphezu konyaka. Nangona kunjalo, imiphumo yokuqhawula umtshato isalahlelwa ngokuziphatha kwabantwana abaye baqhawula umtshato kwabo abazali babo ubomi.
Abantwana abancinci bahlala bebeka isohlwayo ngenxa yokuqhawula abazali babo. Umntwana osekhulile uhlala ecaleni komnye wabazali, ngokuhlala ehlala naye emva kokuqhawula umtshato, aze amangalele omnye umntu. Ulwalamano nomnye umzali lunokuba lubi kakhulu, umntwana ufumana iziphumo zesifo sengqondo kwaye akakwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo ngendlela abantu abadala abazenza ngayo. Kukho ukungonakaliswa kwintsebenzo yesikolo, umntwana unokurhoxiswa, kukho umngcipheko ukuba angene kwinkampani embi. Yonke le mpawu ekuphatheni ibonakala kuba kuphela ngale ndlela umntwana angabonisa ukukhusela ngokuphathelele imeko. Ngelo xesha, uyaqonda ukuba akakwazi ukutshintsha, ngoko uzama ukuhlawulela iimvakalelo eziphazamisayo kuye.
Ukungquzulana nabazali emva kokuqhawula umtshato kubonakaliswe kwinto yokuba umntwana uqala ukuziphatha kakubi, wenqaba ukuthobela imithetho yokuziphatha esekwe kwintsapho. Ukuze kungabonakali imeko, umntu kufuneka abonise ukuqonda. Musa ukukhawuleza umntwana, kufuneka uxoxe naye. Inokwenzeka ukuba, umntwana akayi kuzama ukuchaza ngokukhawuleza ukuziphatha kwakhe. Okuqhelekileyo. Abantwana abavumi ukuhlaziya iinjongo zezenzo zabo. Ngenxa yoko, umbuzo othi "Kutheni uziphatha ngale ndlela?" Ngokuqinisekileyo awuyi kulinda impendulo, okanye umxholo wempendulo awuyi kuhambelana nemeko yembandela. Unokuzama ukwenza unobtrusively ulethe umntwana kwizigqibo ezithile. Ukuba awukwazi ukuzimela ngokuzimeleyo imeko, kungcono ukubonisana nengcali yeengqondo. Ingcali yengqondo inganika iingcebiso malunga nendlela yokulungisa imeko kwimeko, kuba ngezinye iimeko ukulungisa ingxaki kufuneka uguqule ukuziphatha kwakho kungekuphela komntwana, kodwa nakumntu omdala.
Uninzi lweengxabano nabazali emva kokuqhawula umtshato kuvela kubantwana xa izinto ezifunekayo phambi kwazo. Ubume bentshutshiso yengqondo yinto yokuba umntwana ozolileyo, othobelayo, emva kokubandezeleka, uqala ukubonisa ukuziphatha okubi. Ngoko ke, ukuba kukho ukungquzulana nabazali, oku kuthetha ukuba abazali abazange bathathe ingqalelo kumntwana ixesha elide. Unokucebisa ukuchitha ixesha elingakumbi nomntwana, uthetha naye ngeengxaki zabo, ukumcela icebiso kunye nenkxaso. Ekuphenduleni, umntwana uya kuvulela kuwe. Kuphela kukufanele ukwenza yonke into ngokunyanisekileyo, ngokuhlonela umbono womntwana njengomntu. Ngaphandle koko, ubeka ingozi engozini kwandisa imeko. Kwabazali emva kokuqhawulwa komtshato umntwana unokusolisa, kwaye kaninzi unesizathu salo.
Xa umntwana enesimo sengqondo esingalunganga kumzali owamshiyile, unomonde kuphela. Ngamanye amaxesha ukuqonda kuphela kuza neminyaka xa umntwana okhulile ngelo xesha uya kufaka amava akhe ubomi. Njengoko uqeqesho lubonisa, lo mqondo ufika phantse njalo. Kodwa kuthekani ukuba umzali akafuni ukulinda ixesha elide, kwaye ingqondo efanelekileyo yengane ngoku? Kule meko, uya kuphumelela kakhulu. Into ephambili kukuba ukuzama ukuseka ubudlelwane kuyahambisana kwaye akubandakanyi ukungquzulana nomntu osekude naye.
Ngaloo xesha, ngelixa umntwana efana nesimo esitsha (njengoko kuchazwe ngasentla, unyaka), akufuneki ukuba umlimaze kwaye uzama ukwenza ulwalamano olutsha. Oku kusebenza kubo bobabini abasendoda. Xa iqabane elitsha lifunyanwa ngumzali ongasayi kuhlala nomntwana, musa ukubika umntwana ngokukhawuleza.
Ngeengxabano esikolweni, kunye noontanga, kuyimfuneko ukuzama ukunciphisa ubugwenxa ekuphatheni. Unokuza nomsebenzi omtsha okanye umdla oya kumphazamisa umntwana kwaye uncedise ukukhululeka kwengqondo. Kufanelekileyo kakhulu kwimidlalo esebenzayo, ukuhamba. Nika ingqalelo kwinkqubela yomntwana. Bambuze into abayifunayo ekhaya, zeziphi izifundo kunye nootitshala abathandayo, kunye noko bangenayo, kwaye kutheni. Ingxoxo enjalo ayinakunceda ukufumanisa ingxabano kwinqanaba lemvelaphi yazo, kodwa inokunceda ukunxibelelana nomntwana.
Akunabo bonke abantwana emva kokuqhawula umtshato bafumana imeko entsha. Nangona kunjalo, oku akuthethi ukuba abaxhatshazwa yiyo. Ngokuqhelekileyo kwenzeka ukuba abantwana abaye basinda ekuqhawuleni umtshato wabo ngabazali kwiimbono zokucinga bazama ukutshata ngokukhawuleza. Imitshato enjalo iphosakele kwaye ihlawule ngokukhawuleza. Abazali bafuna ukuba abantwana babo babe nolonwabo ngakumbi kwintsapho yabo. Kwaye ukuba kunjalo, kufuneka unakekele ulonwabo lwengomso kwangaphambili kwaye wenze ukulungiswa kwengqondo kwimiba efihlakeleyo neyiyo.