Iqhekeza idla ngokukrakra intlungu, ukungabi nantlonelo, ukuvakalelwa kwinto yokuzixabisa. Oku kubandakanya umona, ukufikelela kwi-pathology, ukungathembeki kunye noshutshiso.
Ngenxa yokuba isiphumo esilindelekileyo asisoloko sihambelana nesiphumo sangempela, kukho ukuxabana. Leli qela libandakanya ukunganeliseki ngokwesini, ukungabikho kwentando, ukunyamekela kunye nokuvakalelwa kwintsapho.
Ukuba abantu abatshatileyo bahluke ngokupheleleyo, ngoko banokwazi ukubeka le ngxabano. Bafumana amava ngaphambi komtshato, kwaye izimo zengqondo kunye nemikhwa ethile sele sele ithathile. Kwaye inzame yokudibanisa amava anjalo kumanyano omnye unokuvusa ingxabano. Indlela kuphela yokuphuma kule meko kukuqonda ukungafani kwimikhwa kunye nomlingiswa. Oku kuya kusenza sifumane isisombululo esinengqiqo.
Iingxaki ezinjalo zixazululwa ngendlela ehambelanayo xa bobabini abalingani beqonda ukuba oku kuyiyo yinjongo, kungekhona ukungafihli kwabo okanye ukungaphumeleli. Kule meko, ukugawula umanyano obonwabileyo kuya kubangela ingxabano, kungekhona ingxabano. Iingxabano zivumeleke ngokupheleleyo, kodwa akukho mfuneko yokuxabana.
Kwale mzuzu kubalulekile ukufunda ukuhlukanisa phakathi kwengxabano kunye nokuxabana. Injongo yembambano kukufumana ingcamango, ngelixa bephikisana neengxabano ekuthandeni isikhundla sabo, kunokuba neemvakalelo ezahlukahlukeneyo, kodwa iinjongo zihlala zingatshintshi nantoni na.
Kukho nawuphi na, izenzo ezinjalo zifuna ukusetyenziswa kwemizamo enqwenela ngamandla oya kukukhusela ukunganeliseki kwakho, ukucaphuka. Kwaye ukuze ukwazi ukuqonda iimvakalelo zakho, kuthatha ixesha. Kodwa oku akuyona inkunkuma yexesha, kodwa utyalo-mali kwikamva elicebileyo losapho.
Impikiswano kufuneka ikhusele iqabane lakho, kwaye nawuphi na umzekelo ungashiyekanga umkhondo kwimemori yekhethiweyo. Yaye ezi ziindawo zokukhubekisa ukuba kwixesha elizayo unokuba nefuthe elibi kulwalamano lwakho.
Impikiswano ibonisa isimo sengqondo sokuhlonela kwintetho yomdlali kunye nobuntu bakhe. Nangona kunjalo, xa ingxabano iqala ukungquzulana, umsebenzi wokuba unqande umbono kunye nokuthanda kwelo icala, ngoko, xa unokunqoba, wena ngokwakho uya kulahleka.
Isizathu esiqhelekileyo sokuxabana kwintsapho eselula kukuba ukungabikho kwemvakalelo yothando phakathi komtshato. Umyeni uyeka ukunyamekela kwinkqubo yobomi bentsapho. Ukulahlekelwa yintswelo yothando, ukungabikho ngothando phakathi kwendoda nomfazi, ukungabi naluthando phakathi kwabatshati - konke oku kunokuchaphazela ulwalamano.
Ukungabikho kwezakhono zokuchitha ixesha elikhululekile kunye kunye, ngenxa yeli lihlwaya, kunye neveki yokuqalisa.
Isizathu sokuxabana kwintsapho singabonakaliswa ngokungafanelekileyo kwimisebenzi ekhaya, okanye ngokubanzi ukungabikho kwazo. Akukho ukuqonda okunamanyeneyo malunga nokuba ngubani na onokukwenza okanye onokukwenza. Iimfuneko ezingaphezu kokungekho ngokungenakutyelwa kumlingane.
Umtshato uyavuya xa bobabini abatshati ukuba baveze iimvakalelo zabo, amava, ngokucacileyo nangokucacileyo ukubonisa iminqweno yabo, babelane ngexesha elivuyayo.
Kodwa ngokuqhelekileyo siphumelele ekuziphatheni kwethu. Kwaye kwimeko yencoko eyakhayo, apho bobabini amaqabane bafuna ukufumana isisombululo esona siphumo, iinyembezi zivela, zihlenga umnyango, ukuhlaselwa kwentloko. Ingxolo yokubonakalisa ekhitshini, ngokulandelanayo, umyeni ubonakala enganeliseki ngento yokuba wafika emva komsebenzi.
Kukho ukugqithiswa okubangela ukuba iqabane liqikelele into enokwenzeka kwaye ayikho, kodwa kamva ibangela ukungqubuzana. Kodwa akulula ukuba uthethe ngokungathethekiyo, ngokucacileyo malunga noko kukukhathazayo, ngobumnene nangenabuhlungu kumlingani? Kule meko, isizathu sokunganeliseki siya kwaziwa kwaye uya kukwazi ukuba yintoni efuna ukulungiswa.