Injongo ephambili yokunxibelelana phakathi kwabantu abahlukeneyo kukufezekisa ukuqonda. Nangona kunjalo, ukufezekisa oku akuko konke kulula. Umntu ngamnye nomntu othetha naye kulula, kodwa kunomnye kunzima. Ngomntu kulula ukuseka ukuqonda, kunye nomntu esihlala efunga. Enyanisweni, kulula kakhulu ukuseka ubudlelwane obuhle kunye nomntu onabo "amanqaku oqhagamshelwano".
Umgaqo obaluleke kakhulu: ngaphambi kokususa zonke iintlukwano eziye zavela, kubalulekile ukufumana izizathu zezi ngqubana. Ukunxibelelana, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ukwazi ukuphulaphula nokuqonda umxhumanisi wakho. Ukuba uchazela abantu iingcamango zakho kunye neenjongo zakho, unokuphepha ezininzi iingxabano, ukuxabana nokungaqondi kakuhle. Ngokuqhelekileyo, kuphela indlela ekhoyo yokuphuma kwimbambano enzima ukunyaniseka. Nangona kunjalo, inyaniso kufuneka ibonakaliswe kungekhona ukuze ihlazise umxhasi wakhe, kodwa ukuze icacise imeko kuye.
Izizathu zokungaqondani phakathi kwabantu abahlukeneyo zingahluka kakhulu: iimpawu zengqondo, imbono, imbono yenkolo, ezopolitiko. Nangona kunjalo, isizathu esiyinhloko sokungaqondi kakuhle ukungakwazi ukuphulaphula umxhasi wakhe. Emva koko, inxalenye ebaluleke kakhulu yonxibelelwano kukukwazi ukuphulaphula.
Lowo uphulaphula ngenyameko umntu othetha naye, uhlenga ingxaki aze ancede umntu enze iingcamango zakhe. Ukongezelela, inkqubo yokunxibelelana yinkqubo enzima kakhulu, kuba inkqubo yokunxibelelana ithonyelwe kakhulu ukuba umntu uyathetha okanye uhlaziyileyo, kunye neemeko kunye nomoya wabo bobabini abanxibelelana nabo. Ukongeza, amazwi, amagama, isenzo, ithoni kunye nendlela yokuziphatha kufuneka kukhethwe kuxhomekeke kukuphi uhlobo lwenxibelelwano oluqhubayo - olusemthethweni okanye olungacwangciswanga.
Ngethuba lokunxibelelana, sisoloko senza amaphutha amaninzi. Oku kungabikho kokusetyenziswa kwegama lokunyusa kunye namazwi, kunye nezifinyezo ezingadingekile. Ukuseka ubudlelwane kunye nentsholongwane yokunceda, okukuvumela ukuba uqiniseke kwaye uqinisekise ukuba unxibelelwano lwakho.
Ukuba awukwazi ukuqala incoko, kungcono ukhethe nawuphi na umxholo onomdla kwincoko yakho kunye nexesha apho umntu ofuna ukuthetha naye akenzanga nantoni na. Kubalulekile ukukhumbula ukuba omnye umntu akafani ngokufanayo nawe kwaye kufuneka ukwazi ukujonga imeko ngamehlo akhe. Oku kuyinyani ngokukodwa kwiimeko zokulwa.
Kubalulekile ukuba uhlale uhlonipha imbono yomnye umntu, nokuba ingahambelani neyakho nonke. Uyakwazi ukuhlakulela ngokwakho isimo sengqondo ngokuhlonela umntu, ukuba ufunda ukubona kuwo wonke umntu iimpawu ezivela kuye kuphela, oko kukuthi, ubuntu bakhe.
Wonke umntu ufanele uhlonipheke. Xa uhlonipha omnye umntu, uyazihlonela kuqala. Nangona ungelamano oluhle nomntu, unako ukwenza okusemandleni akho ukulungisa. Kwiimeko eziphikisanayo, iingcali zengqondo zicebisa ukuba ungayikhohlwa malunga nomdla wakho. Umdla wakho uya kumenza ube nomdla kunye nokuvuselelwa.
Kukho imigaqo eya kukunceda uqhube incoko evulekile nevulekile kunye nento ebizwa ngokuba yi-interlocutor engathintekiyo. Sebenzisa "ulwimi lwe-I". Ukuqala incoko ngamazwi: "Ngokombono wam ..." okanye "Ndiyibona le meko njenge ...". Ngaloo ndlela, unokuyinciphisa incoko uze ubonise umnxibelelwano wakho ukuba ubonise kuphela imbono yakho kwaye ungenzi inyaniso kwixesha lokugqibela. Ngaloo ndlela, uyaqonda ilungelo lomnxibelelwano lokuba nombono wakhe. Kwaye, kunokwenzeka ukuba uya kuphulaphula ngokubhekiselele ngakumbi kwaye ukhululeke ngakumbi.
Zama ukuthetha malunga nokuziphatha okuthile okanye imeko kwaye ungahambi kuzo zonke iintlobo ze-generalizations. Ngokomzekelo, olo hlobo lwenziwa ngokuthi "Kwakungekho nanye ityala lokuba uza kufika ekhaya ngexesha" aliyi kuba luncedo. Emva kwakho konke, isiqalo esinjalo sencoko siza kunika ithuba lokubalekela kwingxaki oya kugweba. Umntu omangalela ngalo unokuqala ukubonisa kwaye ukhumbule ukuba wenza into ngexesha elifanayo. Zama, okokuqala, ukuba ubonise umxhasi wakho ukuba ukuziphatha kwakhe akuthinteli nawuphi na umntu, kodwa yena ngokwakhe.