Yintoni indoda eyatshatileyo eyayenza xa yayithandana? Enyanisweni, lo mbandela wawufanelekile ngamaxesha onke. Kwakuhlala kukho abafazi kunye neentombi, kwaye ngamnye wayefuna ukuqonda ukuba ngaba ebaluleke kakhulu ebomini bomntu. Kakade, le meko yezinto ayikwazi ukubizwa ngokuba ngumgangatho oqhelekileyo, kodwa, ngaphandle kwesiqhelo, ayinakubalwa.
Yintoni indoda eyatshatileyo eyayenza xa yayithandana? Enyanisweni, kunokukho iindlela ezininzi ezahlukileyo ezixhomekeke kwimvelo kunye neemeko zayo. Ndiza kuzama ukukuxelela malunga nokuhluka okuthandwayo kwesi sihloko.
Okokuqala, kufuneka uqaphele ukuba lo uyayithanda ngokwenene, okanye mhlawumbi umfana wayekhatywe ezinye iingxaki zehlabathi kwaye wayefuna ukuphumla ecaleni. Kodwa, kuya kuthatha ixesha elincinane, uya kuqonda ukuba imidlalo yokukhulula ubomi kunye nothando iyamkhathaza, kwaye uya kubuyela kumfazi wayo kwakhona, ukuba, ngokwenene, uya kwamkela. Kule meko, indoda ayikwazi ukubizwa ngothando. Kalula, ngale ndlela, ukhangele ithuba lokuphepha kwiingxaki zakhe zemihla ngemihla. Ewe, kulula ukufumana inkosikazi engadingi nantoni na, kunokuzama ukufumana izisombululo kwingxaki kumfazi wayo.
Kodwa, kukho ezinye iimeko xa umntu eqonda ukuba uyamthanda omnye umfazi, kwaye umtshato wawuyiphutha lokuyiphukuphuku. Kule meko, unokukhetha enye yeendlela ezininzi.
Akunabo bonke abantu abathandanayo bashiya intsapho. Kwaye, ukuziphatha kwabo akunakubizwa ngokuthi ukuzinikela. Abantu abathembekileyo abacaphukisiyo kwaye abaqambi amanga abo baxabayo. Inokwenzeka ukuba, ukwesaba kudlala indima enkulu apha. Umntu uloyika nje ukutshintsha into ethile. Sele sele ejwayele kule ndlela yokuphila, ekhayeni lakhe nakumntu osondeleyo. H akanakuthanda umfazi wakhe, kodwa ukuya kwindawo ethile ukuqala kwakhona. Kwaye kulula ukuba amadoda anjalo ahambe ngokuhamba. Abafuni ukuthatha uxanduva kwaye benze okuthile malunga nalo. Abafuni ukwenza uxanduva lwezenzo zabo. Kulula ukuba abantu abanjalo baphile kwiintsapho ezimbini kwaye babe nomntu ongathandeki, kunokuba banqunywe ubomi obudala baze baqalise entsha. Bayazi nendlela yokufumana izizathu zabo phambi kwekosikazi yabo kwaye bathembisa ukuba yonke into iya kutshintsha kungekudala. Ngokomzekelo, umntu unokuthetha ngendlela abantwana bakhe kufuneka bakhule ngayo, kuba kuya kuba nzima kubo ukuba upapa ngokukhawuleza uyanyamalala. Okanye, kufuneka ahlawule umboleko kwindlu (imoto, i-dacha, i-moped), kwaye ukuba uyashiya, uya kulahleka ithuba lokuba enze njalo, intsapho yakhe yangaphambili iya kushiywa ngaphandle kwendlu okanye umfazi uya kubadonsa kwiinkundla. Kwakhona, umfana unokuqinisekisa intombazana ukuba umfazi uya kufa ngaphandle kwakhe, ukuba uhlaziye kwaye uya kubeka izandla phezu kwakhe. Kodwa akukho mntu ufuna ukuthatha eso sono. Ingakumbi ukuba intsapho inabantwana. Abantwana, ngendlela, amadoda abuyele kakuhle ekusebenziseni. Batsho ukuba umfazi uza kubuyisela intsapho yakhe kwaye amvumele ukuba ambone unyana wakhe okanye intombi yakhe ethandekayo. Enyanisweni, la madoda kufuneka aphunyuke.
Kwaye, njengabafazi, nabafazi. Aba bantu abayi kuze bathathe uxanduva malunga nenye yezenzo zabo. Kungakhathaliseki ukuba ungubani, uya kuzimela emva kwakho, kwaye ugweme nayiphi na i zigqibo. Ukuba amadoda anjalo abeka umbuzo ngokukhawuleza, azama ukuphepha yonke impendulo kwaye akhuphe umcimbi. Kubantu abanjalo, ngokwenene, kukhululekile kakhulu ukuhlala kunye nabasetyhini ababathandayo. Yingakho abayi kuze bakhethe, ngoko bobabili uya kuhlushwa ngothando nomona.
Kukho olunye uhlobo lwabantu. Bahlala beyazi indlela yokwenza ukhetho kwaye babe noxanduva malunga noko bathethayo nokuthembisa. Ukuba umntu onjalo uyamthanda omnye umfazi kwaye uyaqonda. Into engenakulibala ngaye, ngokuqhelekileyo, ushiya intsapho. Ewe, eneneni, ngokuba umfazi ubuhlungu kwaye kunzima ukwamukelwa kwaye uphile, kodwa, kunjalo, inyaniso enzima kunobomi obuhle. Ubuncinci akaqambi amanga aze amnike ithuba lokuba aphile kwaye afune ukuzonwabisa. Njengoko bethetha: awukwazi ukuyalela intliziyo yakho, ngoko ke, kungakhathaliseki ukuba amantombazana abrakra, kufuneka aqonde oku. Ungazami ukugcina indoda, kuba yileyo ndlela bonke abantu baya kubandezeleka, kuquka nabantwana, ukuba ngaba. Kungakhathaliseki ukuba buhlungu kangakanani, kuyimfuneko ukuzama ukuxolela nokuyeka. Ngaphandle kwaba bafana kukuba abazange banike abantwana babo. Nangona umntu eshiya intsapho, abantwana basoloko behlala ebaluleke kakhulu ebomini. Indoda ayiyi kubonga imali ye-alimony okanye izipho. Ukongeza, uya kubanika ixesha elaneleyo, eze ukutyelela aze enze konke ukuba abe ngumzali ozele. Ukuba unendima yowomfazi, owamshiya kuye, ungaze uxoxe nabantwana kunye noyihlo kwaye ungabavumeli ukuba babone. Oku kuyisiphukuphuku kwaye kakubi ngokukodwa. Ukuze kungenzeki phakathi kwabazali, abantwana abanakuze bahlupheke, khumbula kakuhle. Ngaba awuyi kuba yintlungu, ukuba uyayazi ukuba umntwana ukhwele uyise, kwaye naye ufuna ukumbona, ungakhathazeki ngengqondo yengane yakhe ethandekayo. Wena, ngexesha, kuya kuba lula, kodwa i-psyche ephukile iya kufuneka ilungiswe iminyaka emininzi.
Ukuba ungumfazi oya kumntu, uya kubonisa ubulumko aze angabi nomona ngabantwana bakhe. Oku kuyisiphukuphuku, kakubi kwaye kukhokelela kwi-scandals, kwaye emva koko kwahlukana. Eyona nto iphezulu, ukuba uzama ukwenza izihlobo nomntwana wakhe. Ewe, ekuqaleni, kunokwenzeka ukuba uya kukuphatha kakubi. Kodwa, akukho okungaqhelekanga kule nto, kuba ngenxa yenu unina unenkathazo. Kodwa, ukuba unako ukubonisa umonde kunye nokunyamekela, uthembeke kwaye uthembeke, ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, uya kuba nohlobo.
Ezi zimbini zokuziphatha mhlawumbi ziyimpendulo eyaziwayo kakhulu kumbuzo: yintoni indoda eya kutshatayo eya kuyenza xa ithelwa ngothando? Ewe, kukho iintlobo ezininzi zeemeko, kwaye umntu ngamnye ukhetha indlela yakhe yokuziphatha. Kodwa kunjalo, kwiimeko ezininzi, umntu uzimisele, okanye bonke ubomi bakhe buyathaba bobabini abafazi. Yaye ukuba ngaba kunjalo, kuyafaneleka ukuba ucinga ngaphambi kokuba uhlale naye.