Ibali eliqhelekileyo, sitshata, njengomthetho, ngokuthandana kunye nobudlova, kodwa ngokukhawuleza emininzi imitshato inika into ephawulekayo, ngaloo ndlela ikhula ibe yingxaki yentsapho. Bobabini unqamle, njengokuba wawudla, wenze izipho ezimnandi, umangalisi, uthethe ngeemvakalelo zakho, indlela ongenakuyenza ngaphandle komnye. Yonke ubomi ejikeleze kuwe yaqala ukusekelwe kuphela kwizicelo ezibuhlungu kunye nezipho. Ukuza rhoqo kusihlwa emsebenzini, uzama, ungaxubushelani kwaye ungabelani ngeengxaki zakho, kwaye nayiphi na ingxoxo engabalulekanga ingaguqukela kwi-scandal yehlabathi. Nonke niqale ukuzibamba ngeoli, ukuba ngaphantsi niyambona indoda, iyancipha isimo sakho sengqondo kunye neentsholongwane. Ngaphandle koko, uyaxolisa. Ubundlobongela, kwintsapho yakho, luye lwaba lukholo olude nolungenangqondo, kwaye ngamanye amazwi, lwaphela nje ebomini bakho. Indoda iyatshitshisa umfazi-umfazi womyeni kunye njalo imihla ngemihla. Uye wayeka ukuziva ekhuselekile, ethandwa, efunwayo kwaye efunekayo. Wazifumana kwimeko efanayo. Lapha akusilo uthando kunye nokugqitywa okupheleleyo kumntu omtshato. Njengoko bethetha, iingqondo apha azivumi. Apha ke, enye yezinto ezimbalwa, iimpawu ukuba indoda nomfazi abathandani.
Izizathu zolu, ngokwezengqondo, kakhulu. Kwakhona, kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba ukuza kuleso siqhelo emtshatweni wabo, abatshatileyo banokuthi, njengomnyaka wabo wobomi obudibeneyo, nangemva kwemihlanu, iminyaka elishumi okanye ngaphezulu. Enyanisweni, kwimimiselo emide yomtshato, le ngongoma yokutshatyalaliswa kweemvakalelo zenzeke ngokuphindaphindiweyo kunezigaba zokuqala zomtshato. Masibuyele ngokufanayo kwizizathu, ngenxa yokuba uthando phakathi kwentsapho phakathi kwabatshatileyo luhlala luphela. Okokuqala, ndifuna ukukhankanya ukuba thina ngokwethu sizinwabile kwaye, ngokufanelekileyo, iimvakalelo zethu. Kwaye, ngokuphindaphindiweyo kunokuba kunjalo, thina ngokwethu siyabhubhisa uthando lwethu, ngaloo ndlela sisichukumisa iqabane lethu ukunikezela izikhundla kunye nokwabelana nothando lwakho. Ngokomzekelo, ukunganeliseki rhoqo, ukuhlambalaza nokuxabana - ngaba ngaba "ababulali" bokuqala beemvakalelo zethu. Ingxaki zezindlu okanye ukungahambelani kwabalinganiswa, zidlala nje indima ebalulekileyo. Ngokomntu wokugqibela, ngokuqhelekileyo abantu ngaphambi komtshato ngokupheleleyo kwaye bafundanga ngokupheleleyo, kwaye sele sele bendibomi bombutho, kunye nomngcongolo ngomnwe, kubonisa abantu ngokuseminye imibala.
Esinye isizathu kukuba abafazi babesandulana ngokukhawuleza, belahlekelwa nayiphi na inzala. Ulwalamano lwabo lulahlekelwe yintando ephawulekayo yemvakalelo, iimvakalelo, amava. Kwaye, njengokuba uyazi, ubomi, ngaphandle kwexesha elithandekayo lomtshato, lonakalisa uthando kwimpembelelo yalo. Kule meko, indoda nomfazi balahlekelwa ukukhwabelana ngesondo, bezama ukuzifumana kwabanye abantu abathandayo. Apha, kubalulekile ukungeza. Ukunyuka, indoda kunye nomfazi ngakwesobunxele, bavame ukudibanisa iimvakalelo zabo kwisigxina kunye nesi sibini, njengesigqibo, kuba bona ngokwabo abakwazi ukuphendula umbuzo onzima: "Ubani othandayo, okwangoku?". Ukusuka ngasentla, saqaphela ukuba kukho izizathu ezininzi zokunganeliseki ngobomi kunye kunye nokukhokelela ekuthandeni. Zonke ezi zinto ziyi-causal, ngokukhawuleza zenza njengesiseko esihle sokuxabana kwintsapho, ekhokelela ekuphumeni kweemvakalelo eziphakamileyo ezifana nothando, kwi-antipathy. Kwaye, njengesiphelo, umfazi nomyeni baqala, ngokungafani ukuthwalana nomoya kwaye bahlala njengentaka kunye nenja phantsi kophahla olulodwa. Ngoko, ubomi abuhle. Ngokuqinisekileyo, ukuze angamthuthuli, kungeyena ngokwakhe, le ngxaki kufuneka ixazululwe kungekudala okanye kamva. Ukuba ubude kwaye uqiniseke ngokuqinisekileyo ukuba ube ngumntu ongaziwayo kunye naye, qalisa usebenze ngokuthe ngqo. Ungesabi ukutshintsha nantoni na, kuba uqhubeka ususa le mthwalo, kuya kuba nzima nakakhulu. Wena nje, kungekudala okanye kamva, qalisa ukuzonda umlingane wakho, kwaye unayo kwaye ide yenzeke, kufuneka wenze into ethile. Ukuphila ngaphandle kothando kwindlu enye kunye nokubonana nomhla ngemihla akusivavanyo olulula kumfazi okanye indoda.
Ukuba intsapho yakho inabantwana, wazi ukuba awuyi kuzama ukugcina intsapho epheleleyo kubo, awuyi kuphumelela nonke. Kufana nokuphila kwi-powder keg, leyo nayiphi na imini ingaqhuma. Ukongezelela, umntwana, kwindawo yokuqala, uzive engxakini yengqondo ngenxa yobudlelwane obubi phakathi kwabazali. Kungcono ukuba umntwana akahlali kwintsapho epheleleyo, kodwa ekuphumleni okuphefumlelweyo, engakuphulaphuli iimpikiswano zakho kunye neentlekele. Umntwana, xa ekhula, uya kuqonda yonke into. Into ephambili ayikukuxelela lowo ungendawo kwaye ngubani olungileyo. Ufuna, mvumele akhulume noyise okanye unina, kungekhona kuxhomekeke ekubeni ngaba abazali bahlangene okanye hayi.
Enyanisweni, kwintsapho nganye imeko leyo yodwa kwaye yile nto, okokuqala, ukuba yonke into ifanele ixoxwe kwitheyibhile "yentsapho" yeengxoxo. Ukuva uluvo olufanayo malunga nalo mbandela. Kwaye, ekugqibeleni, sinqume ukuba ufuna ukuqhubeka uhlala kunye ngenxa yabantwana, okanye indlela efanelekileyo kukuphelisa. Unako, okwenene, ukwenza ikhefu kubomi bentsapho kwaye ukhululeke komnye nomnye, uhlala ngokuhlukileyo ngexesha elithile. Njengoko uqeqesho lubonisa, ngamanye amaxesha lusebenza. Ukuba kude nomnye kunye kunye kunye neengcamango zabo, abantu bakuthola kulula ukuziqonda baze baqonde into abayifunayo ebomini ngokwenene. Mhlawumbi kukuba loo mbhangqwana isondele nje kunye kwaye yingakho badidekile kwiimvakalelo zabo, kwaye ngoko ibinzana! Indoda nomfazi abathandani "balahlekelwa ngokufanelekileyo. Kwaye, njengokuba uyazi, umgama uphulukisa nasiphi na isifo sengqondo. Ukuba ubona ukuba intsapho iyaphela ngokupheleleyo kwaye awukwazi ukuyibuyisela nangayiphi na indlela, ke kukho enye indlela yokuphuma - umtshato. Zikhulule wena kunye nentando yothando olutsha.