Ngoko ke, ukuba uphinde uphazamise kwaye ucinge ngento oyenzayo xa umyeni wakho efihla umvuzo wakho kuwe, hlalutya yakho kunye nokuziphatha kwakhe. Bobabini banetyala, indoda kunye nawe. Ngoko, makhe sijonge iindlela ezininzi zokuba kutheni umntu ondibathandayo engakuxeleli ukuba ufumana phi kwaye uyafihla umvuzo wakhe. Mhlawumbi ufihla imali kuba ungamvumeli ukuba achithe yona. Zixelele: kutheni ukwenza oku. Kakade ke, izizathu zezi zinto zingabalulekanga. Ngokomzekelo, umyeni wakho uchitha imali ngokuphumla kunye nabahlobo kunye notywala, engayithobeli ingqalelo ukuba imali iyadingeka ukuhlawula indlu, ukuthenga ukutya nezinye izinto ezininzi, ngaphandle kokungenakwenzeka ukuba ziphile. Kule meko, unokuyiqonda ngokupheleleyo kwaye uyayixhasa. Kodwa yintoni enokuyenza ngokuziphatha kwakhe? Ukuba umntu omncinci uneengxaki ezibonakalayo zobunxila, kule meko kuyimfuneko ukuqhagamshelana neengcali, kuba kunzima ukujamelana nezifo ezinjalo. Nantoni na ukuthethayo, mhlawumbi akayi kukuphulaphula. Kodwa ukuba indoda ifihla imali ngenxa yokuba ifuna ukuzonwabisa kunye nabahlobo, zama ukuyixelela into eyiphutha ngayo. Ukwenza oku, unokwenza uluhlu lweendleko kwizinto zonke ozifunayo, into oyithengayo inyanga, kwaye udibanise nokuhlola. Tshela umthandi wakho ukuba ungubani, kwaye kutheni ufuna ukuba ahlawule ngokupheleleyo umvuzo wakhe. Unokuphakamisa enye inketho: mayeke imali kuye, kodwa ngexesha elifanayo ngokuzithengayo uthenge inxalenye yemveliso nezinto. Kungenzeka ukuba uya kuvuma le ndlela kwaye kungekudala uya kuqonda ukuba kutheni ufuna ukuba akuxelele malunga nemali enayo. Ukuba ukunyaniseka kwakho akusebenzi kwaye akhathaleli oko uhlala khona, kwaye abahlobo bahlala beza kuqala, ngoko kufuneka ucinge ngobani obaluleke ngakumbi kuye nokuba ingaba nokwenza umntu osapho oluqhelekileyo nomntu onjalo.
Kukho neemeko xa abantu besetyenziselwa imali kwizinto esinokuzicingela ezingadingekile kwaye ezingenanto. Ngokuqhelekileyo, abafazi bahlala bethetha ukungafuni, kwaye amadoda kufuneka afihle ezi ndleko. Ngaloo ndlela, phendula ngokunyanisekileyo wena: uyathukuthela, kuba ukuthenga kwakhe kunempembelelo enkulu kwintsholongwane yentsapho okanye ucatshukiswa kukuba uyifumana ezi zinto. Ukuba unenalo ngokwaneleyo ebomini, yathetha naye ngendlela endacetywe ngayo ngasentla. Kodwa ukuba uyayiqonda ukuba uyamthukuthelela kuphela ngenxa yokuba ungayiboni into ekufunyenwe kuyo, cinga ngento yokuba ezininzi izinto ezithengiweyo nazo azinakuqondakala kubafana. Bathuthukile, kutheni uthenge esinye isambatho seembotyi, ibhatyi kunye neqela leziqholo. Khumbula ukuba amabhinqa namadoda anemilinganiselo eyahlukileyo. Sicinga ukuba sifuna kuphela ingubo efanelekileyo isiqingatha somvuzo, kwaye umfana ufuna ukuthenga, umzekelo, ikrele elitsha kwingqokelela yakhe yezixhobo. Ngoko ke, ukuba uyazi ukuba wena ngokwakho awunakuziphika, ziqonde ukuba unelungelo lokunqanda umfana ukuba athenge into enokumenza abe novuyo olufanayo njengesiqhwenga esitsha kuwe. Inyaniso yokuba uyazifihla umvuzo wakhe, akukho nto ithetha ukuba akakuthandi. Umfana othile wayekhatywe yi-scandals ngesiseko seminqweno yakhe encinci waza wagqiba ekubeni kungcono ukuba ungazi ngabo. Kodwa kwintsapho kunzima ukufihla into ethile, ngoko ufumanisa malunga nayo kwaye awukhathazi. Ukuze ukhuphe ukungqubuzana okunjalo, thintana nomthandayo, uchaze ukuba kutheni wenze njalo kwaye uthembisa ukuba ngoku angakwazi ukuwanelisekisa, kodwa ke, kungekhona kwindleko yohlahlo lwabiwo-mali. Ukuba umyeni ubona ukuba uhlala ukhululekile malunga noko achitha imali kuyo, ngokukhawuleza kuya kutshabalalisa intsingiselo yokufihla umvuzo wakhe.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, sihlala sicinga ukuba siyazi kakuhle indlela yokusasaza imali ngemali kwaye singabi njala. Yingakho abantu abaninzi besifazane bacela kwaye bafuna ukuba banikele yonke imivuzo yabo. Kodwa enyanisweni, asikude nokuba sikulungile njengoko sicinga. Amadoda ayazi nendlela yokuphatha imali. Nangona baphosakele, bafunda kwiimpazamo zabo. Kakade ke, kuphela xa sinika ithuba lokufunda. Ngoko ke, ukuba umfana ufuna ukulahla imali yakhe, makenze njalo. Unokumnceda ngeengcebiso ezilungileyo. Kodwa akufuneki ubonise yonke imbono yokuba akaqondi nto, kodwa ukhona yonke into kwaye uhlale uqonda. Kwakhona, akufanele ukhalime ngenxa yezinto ezinzima ongaziqondiyo. Umzekelo, ukulungiswa kwemoto. Nangona ungaqondi ukuba inkcazelo encinci inokuthi ixabise kakhulu, ayithethi ukuba ayikwazi ukuba nexabiso elinjalo. Ngoko uzama ukukhalaza ngale nto. Ekugqibeleni, indoda yakho, inokwenzeka, ayikufundisi ukuba kukuphi ukutya okulungileyo kukuthenga, kwaye yiyiphi into efanelekileyo yokugqoka entsha. Ngoko uzama ukungathethi apho ungakwazi khona ngokwaneleyo.
Ukuba awuyikratshi iqabane lakho ngenxa yokunyaniseka kwakhe, mhlawumbi uya kuhlala evuma ngokunyanisekileyo kuwe ukuba ufumene kangakanani. Ngaloo nto, ukufihla umvuzo, intetho ngokuvamile ayiyi kuqhutywa. Ukuba uyaqhubeka 'umbona' kuye nayiphi na ipensenti esetshenzisiweyo, impendulo iya kuba yimfihlo kwaye ayikuthembi.